Oh Puddin!
by Harley's Little Harlequin
Summary: It's Harley and Joker's anniversary and Harley is ready to make it the best one yet but one little issue stands in her way.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: Hello babies! I know I should be working on my other stories but you all know how plot bunnies are and how nagging they can be so I had to write this story. I hope you enjoy and please don't forget to review!**

 **Oh puddin'!**

The morning sun was just barely peaking over the tops of the Gotham city buildings filling rooms with pearlescent rays, all but one a penthouse with its bedroom windows covered by thick blackout curtains. Harley rolled over under the black silk sheets sighing lightly in her sleep before groaning as her body decided it was time to wake up. She opened her eyes slowly blinking a couple times to look at the digital clock on her night stand then mentally cursed seeing it was 6:30. Looking beside her she smiled seeing Joker still sleeping on his back the arm she'd been curled up in against his chest, slipping out of bed she silently padded to the closet and took out one of Joker's favorite outfits of her's, a pair of blue jean shorts and a flannel button down that clung to her figure, then slipped into the bathroom.

Once in the bathroom she took a quick shower before drying herself off, getting dressed, plugging in her curling iron, and doing her makeup perfectly. Once her makeup was done she began curling her hair humming to a tune in her head while looking over a little list set on the counter.

"Wake up early, check uhh sorta. Shower and look perfect,"

She stood turning off the iron and fluffed her curls in the mirror.

"Check! What's next?"

She picked up the list looking it over.

"Special breakfast in bed."

She smiled and quietly left the bathroom looking back at the bed giggling seeing Joker still asleep but now on his stomach holding her pillow. She left the room humming once again as she skipped into the kitchen and began making Joker's favorite breakfast, crispy bacon, lightly salted sunny side up eggs and her famous pancakes. Organizing the filled plate on a tray with a glass of orange juice and a small vase with a single red rose in it she smiled nodding proudly at her work grabbing the list.

"Special breakfast made now just to take it upstairs."

Picking up the tray she made her way back to the master bedroom and pushed open the door watching the tray so she didn't spill.

"Puddin' wakey wakey, I made breakfast!"

She looked up hearing him groan and had to set the tray down so she didn't drop it upon finding his pale cheeks flushed, sweat clinging to his forehead, he was shivering and seemed to be having trouble getting a proper breath. Moving to sit on the edge of the bed she pressed the back of her hand to his forehead and nearly yanked it back feeling the high fever but the coolness of her skin compared to his heated skin seemed to ease his behavior as his eyes opened.

"Harley why are you lookin' at me like that?"

Harley gave a small smile moving her hand to his cheek.

"You're burnin' up puddin', I think ya might be sick."

Joker gave a weak growl pushing her hand away.

"I'm not sick, I don't get sick."

Harley opened her mouth to argue but closed it as he tried to sit up only managing to prop himself against the pillows before grimacing in pain squeezing his eyes shut. Biting her lip she got to her feet and went to the bathroom taking out a small makeup bag opening it revealing various medicines and other illness objects, digging a little she found the thermometer and smiled to herself going back to the bedroom but froze in her tracks seeing Joker no longer in bed but rather leaning on the wall beside the closet his cheeks more flushed, his skin paler than normal, and sweat matting his green hair.

"Puddin' no! Come on back to bed ya get!"

Reluctantly he let her drag him back to bed and laid down closing his eyes.

"Open up."

He opened his eyes leering at her but only got a stern look in return making him growl but opened his mouth letting her put the thermometer under his tongue before closing it again as she went back to the bathroom and came back seconds later with a damp cloth dabbing his forehead, he wouldn't admit it nor could he with the thermometer in his mouth that the wet cloth felt good against his skin taking away the heat a little. Finally the thermometer beeped and Harley took it back reading it biting her lip.

"102.3, I'm sorry ta say it but you're sick Mr. J. Probably from bein' out in the rain the other day."

Joker growled at her trying to get up again only to be stopped by her hands on his shoulders.

"Nope you're stayin' in bed till that fever comes down."

He leered at her.

"You can't tell me what to do Harley, I ain't stayin' in bed just because of a damned fever!"

With that he shoved her arms away and forced himself up causing Harley to throw her hands up but follow him crossing her arms and smirking when he leaned on the wall closing his eyes holding his head.

"Come on Mr. J, just lay down and the room will Aro spinnin' I promise."

Her only response was him reaching out and putting a hand on her shoulder letting her take him back to the bed where he lid down holding his head.

"You stay put and I'll go get ya some medicine and maybe a little soup."

Her only response that time was a light snore making her smile and see he'd fallen asleep finally. Laying the cool cloth over his forehead she carefully stood from the bed and grabbed the breakfast tray carrying it back down to the kitchen setting it on the counter before searching around for the cold medicine she kept around just in case she got sick but growled not finding it.

"Something wrong miss Harley?"

Harley looked over her shoulder then turned around to face Frost who was dressed for business holding a few papers looking over the arranged food making her sigh and push it to him deciding it was better than letting it go to waste. A little confused, and apprehensive though not without reason, he sat on the stool and started to eat while Harley searched the back of the fridge grumbling as all she found was some waaaay out of date strep throat medicine. Tossing the bottle in the trash she leaned on the counter crossing her arms knowing she didn't have any cold medicine in her bag upstairs but she wasn't about to leave the house with Joker sick. She drummed her fingers on the counter before she smiled turning to Frost making him flinch but hold her gaze.

"I need ya to do somethin' for me Frost."

Frost nodded.

"Anything ya say miss Harley."

Harley smiled, Frost was really the only one she let call her that friendly formal name to everyone else she was just miss or highness.

"Could ya go to the drug store and get some cold medicine, fever reducer and a cold compress or two?"

Frost blinked surprised by the odd list but nodded getting to his feet.

"Right away miss Harley. Is it out of line to ask why?"

Harley's smile turned a little dark.

"Oh not at all Frosty boy! It's for Mr. J, he ain't feelin' so hot so if ya don't get them quick it's bye -bye birdie."

She snickered a laugh as he swallowed thickly then left the apartment. Harley nodded once before pouring a glass of ice water and grabbing a couple saltine crackers and taking them back up to the bedroom. She perched herself on the edge of the bed carefully placing one hand on the back of Joker's neck knowing he was awake gently placing the glass to his lips.

"Here this should help a little until Johnny gets back with medicine."

Joker opened his eyes to see what she was trying to make him drink but relaxed sipping at the water until he's had enough. Harley smiled setting the glass aside lightly stroking his hair.

"Glad to see my misfortune is giving you joy Harls."

His tone was sarcastic making her roll her eyes but continue her actions.

"That ain't it Mr. J, it's just that you're normally takin' care of me so this makes me happy that I get to return the favor."

Joker closed his eyes choosing not to answer her but try and rest a little more. Harley sighs with a smile and moves so she is curled up in the margin between Joker and the edge of the bed with her head resting on her palm while the other still runs through his hair. Before long her eyes start getting heavy and she yawns letting her head rest on the pillow and her eyes slip shut falling asleep her hand now resting on Joker's chest. After about an hour she's woken by Joker rolling to his side facing away from her coughing harshly a few times making her sit up rubbing his back.

"Easy does it puddin', don't hack up a lung on me."

Her response was a weak growl before he coughed a few more times until the spell passed leaving him winded against the pillows. She got to her feet and quickly headed down to the kitchen to see if Frost had come back. When she reached the kitchen she smiled seeing the bag on the counter quickly grabbing the cold and cough medicine bottle and a spoon she went back to the master bedroom finding Joker sitting up against the pillows so his head was resting against the headboard his eyes closed.

Reading the dosage chart Harley shook and opened the bottle pouring enough into the spoon before sitting on the bed holding it out to him.

"Here puddin' take this, it'll help."

Joker opened his eyes looking at the red liquid in the spoon then her before turning away. Harley blinked, this was new sure he'd turned stuff away but this was childish refusal as he kept turning his head away from the spoon.

"Oh for the love of Batman, come on Mr. J ya gotta take it! Don't force me to make ya!"

He looked at her with a raised brow and a challenging look in his eyes causing her to huff.

"Fine then but remember you made me do this."

Before he could act she put the spoonful of liquid into her own mouth and kissed him forcing the medicine into his mouth and not moving until he swallowed, once he did she pulled away wiping her mouth and shuddering at the taste in her mouth.

"Urg ew, that tasted like crap, but at least ya took it."

Joker narrowed his eyes at her.

"Don't ever do that again or else."

Harley looked at him and couldn't help but laugh at how he looked, his cheeks still flushed but more from embarrassment than fever, her lipstick smudged over his mouth, his arms crossed over his chest and as close to a pout as he'd dare show. Hearing her laugh he growled looking at her.

"What are you laughing at?!"

Harley managed to stop laughing holding her sides.

"I'm sorry puddin'."

Her smile turned to a smirk as she moved closer to him.

"And what exactly is it you'd do ta me if I make you take the medicine again?"

Joker met her eyes and pulled her into his lap roughly but not enough to hurt her just make her gasp as she found herself straddling him.

"Don't get cocky with me kitten, just cause I'm sick doesn't mean you won't be punished."

Harley raised an eyebrow still smiling at him.

"And how are ya gonna punish me when you don't even have the energy to stand up?"

Joker's face lost all traces of playing making her flinch and swallow thickly before cringing as he raised his hand then laughing trying to squirm away as he tickled her side.

"Ahhh! No stop! Please!"

Joker smirked continuing his assault one arm holding her waist in an iron grip while the other tickled her till tears rolled down her cheeks.

"Are you goin' to be a good girl and not force daddy to take the medicine again?"

Harley nodded trying to grab his hand.

"Y-yes!"

Joker smiled victoriously stopping his assault and holding her as she slumped against him her laughs turning into slow breathy giggles before they stopped as she nuzzled his chest closing her eyes. He traced small circles on her back before looking down at her as she lifted her eyes to his.

"Some anniversary huh?"

Joker looked at her confused before it struck him it was the anniversary of the day he'd created Harley Quinn and they'd rose to rule over Gotham's underground, he'd had a surprise planned for her involving causing chaos all over the city then coming home to the surprise. Tearing his eyes away he looked at the drawer of his night stand before kissing her cheek.

"Get in the drawer and take out the box in there."

Harley extracted herself from him enough to open the drawer and grab the little red velvet box then sit in his lap with her back to his chest examining the object in her hands.

"It's not how this was going to go, I was going to take you to cause all kinds of trouble the come back and…"

His words trailed off and as she looked at him over her shoulder finding him flushing again she grabbed the cold cloth and began dabbing at his forehead until he grabbed her wrist.

"Just open it."

Harley looked at him confused before turning back around and opening the box. She nearly dropped it as her hands started shaking looking at the object nestled into the soft red velvet, a ring with a slim silver band, three rubies shaped like diamonds and smaller rubies alternating with black onyx stones halfway down both sides of the band. Tears filled her eyes as she liked at the ring.

"Oh puddin'!"

Joker looked at her.

"You better like it, it was a pain to get ahold of."

Deciding to play his own trick on him she forced her smile away as she took the ring out and slipped it on examining how it sat perfectly on her finger.

"I don't like it,"

She paused smirking hearing him growl and his hands clench into fists before she giggled turning around placing her hands on his shoulders pressing her forehead to his.

"I love it puddin'!"

Slowly his anger receded and his hands held her hip as he closed his eyes.

"Silly woman, why do I...why do I…"

His words trailed off making her brows knit together as he looked like he was trying to force his words out. She gently cupped his face.

"It's okay Mr. J, I get the message, 'stupid woman why do I put up with you?' right?"

Joker opened his eyes before shaking his head taking her face into his hands taking a deep breath.

"No, shut up for a second so I can tell you that I...that I love you!"

Harley looked at him wide eyed tears falling down her cheeks as she looked at him baffled.

"Y-you what?"

Joker screwed his eyes shut growling.

"I love you, you stupid, insufferable, annoying, insane, amazing woman!"

Harley's face broke into a smile as she threw her arms around his neck kissing him not caring about getting sick.

"I love you too Mr. J."

He rolled his eyes but kissed her back holding her close to him.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Hey babies! So initially this was going to be a one shot but the more I thought the more I felt I wanted to make it a collection of one shots (Lucky you!)! So once again if you have any prompts for me or would like to see something go ahead and let me know either in a review or shoot me a message! Thanks babies!**

 **Prompt: Harley is afraid of something silly.**

 **Oh Harls. (Yes I had to play on the first title)**

There was little in the world that actually scare Harley anymore, after jumping head first into a vat of chemicals and being pulled out by the psychopathic clown that she loved and becoming his queen there just wasn't anything left to scare her. Spiders were no issue she'd either ignore them, talk to them or just smoosh them like it was nothing. Mice didn't even get a squeak out of her as she grabbed them by the tails and left them in the alley where they would either live or be eaten stray cats. Even the one time a bat- an actual flying, squeaking bat- had gotten into the penthouse she chased it down with her baseball bat and threw it outside for the alley cats. Yes there was very little that scared Harley anymore and Joker could easily run down the list of what they were, being separated from him for an ungodly amount of time again, the thought of him dying or the thought of him leaving her and those were mostly it or so he thought.

The sky had been grey and overcast all day, nothing new really for Gotham, but today the clouds seemed darker angrier as they looked over the tops of buildings that claimed to scrape the sky. Harley was lounging around the penthouse wearing one of Joker's white button down shirts, a pair of grey sweatpants, her fuzzy pink slippers and her hair pulled up in a messy bun. Joker was away on business for the afternoon leaving her the apartment and a couple goons for protection, not to mention the countless number of knives, guns and other weapons stored around, but she was content just sitting on the couch eating her way through a box of left of Chinese food while watching some pathetic soap opera.

Looking at the clock she grabbed the remote and switched the television over to the news watching to see about Batman's latest intervention in the criminal world. She rolled her eyes seeing nothing more than a couple wannabe villain gangs had been taken in but smiled knowing that meant Joker had slipped right under the bat-freak's nose. Setting the empty food container on the coffee table she dug her phone out from her hoodie pocket and checked for any messages from Joker and pouted when she found none, setting her phone on the table she got to her feet and headed for the bedroom to shower off and get ready for bed.

Half way down the hall the lights suddenly flickered making her pause and listen to try and find a reason, she could hear the rain pounding against the roof and windows making her relax a little entering the bedroom and flipping the lights on unaware that in the living room her phone was buzzing from a new text. She was just about to open the bathroom door when with a loud crash the lights went out drawing a shriek from her as she covered her ears, waiting a moment she slowly removed her hands looking around but only found darkness surrounding her, suffocating her.

Slowly she felt her way around the room but growled as she found herself at the foot of the bed, sitting on top of the comforter she crossed her arms trying to mentally argue how she'd gotten turned around when she was right in front of the door. Suddenly the room with lit by a blinding flash making her breath catch in her throat then a small scream burst from her lips as it happened again and again each flash followed by a roll of thunder until the build up released a crash as loud as a small bomb making her cover her ears and scramble under the covers of the bed tears streaming down her face.

Out in the city the rain had only helped Joker and his men slip away from the now robbed clean bank without much detection, he'd messaged Harley as they left that he was on his way back but never got a response making him growl in frustration. After three more unanswered texts he gave up and decided to call her but again no answer, snarling he threw his phone into the seat beside him and pushed the sleek purple Lamborghini to its limit red clouding the sides of his vision. Yes he'd left Harley home without more than a handful of goons and an armory of weapons for protection and even if those few goons were newbies surely they could protect her and if not there wasn't a doubt she could protect herself.

He whipped the car around corners and other cars carelessly his mind flashing scenario after scenario, the bat figuring out she'd be left mostly unguarded and taking the chance to kidnap her, any villain with a grudge against the pair taking her to use as leverage, and countless others. Finally reaching the hidden garage he parked the car and made his way up through the club to the penthouse, as he reached the top of the stairs the first thing he noticed was that all the lights were out and the second was a faint dinging sound. Following it he found Harley's phone lit up on the coffee table showing his texts and missed call, setting the phone down he looked around taking in what he could as the lightning flashed.

"Harley?!"

He listened carefully as the thunder cracked for any response but got nothing in return except a small thud from down the hall. Growling he pulled out his gun from its holster and made his way down the hall to the door of the master bedroom.

"Harley?"

Again he listened and this time his response was a muffled sob making him throw the door open eyes darting around for any sign of danger in the lightning's quick flashes but saw nothing. Taking cautious steps into the room he searched for Harley but didn't see her anywhere as the lights flickered on for a moment letting him see the room fully, everything was intact but the bed with its cover completely askew with the pillows laying haphazardly but the obnoxious pink one Harley kept on her side was gone.

"Harley where are you? Stop playing before I get mad."

He heard shuffling by the bed making him aim his gun but lower it at once as Harley poked her head out from under it tears still staining her cheeks as she looked at him.

"P-puddin'?"

Putting his gun away he went to her and carefully pulled her out from under the bed staggering a little off balance as she threw herself into his arms hiding her face in his neck. After the slight shock wore off he wrapped his arms around her trying to calm her down.

"What happened baby"

Harley shook her head sniffling holding herself close to him then flinching as the lightning flashed wildly and the thunder crashed loud like a bomb again drawing a son to her lips as the lights went back out. Looking out at the storm then down at Harley he took her face in his hands making her look at him her eyes slightly red from crying, makeup running down her cheeks and her lower lip trembling Joker let a smile creep into his lips.

"Harley are you afraid of storms?"

Harley blushed but didn't answer as she avoided his eyes making him chuckle running the backs of his fingers along her jaw.

"Harley Quinn the psychotic girlfriend to the Joker, wanted in 12 states, Queen of Gotham City, the woman who can kill a man just because he cat called her is afraid of storms?"

Harley blushed deeper tears rolling down her cheeks again as she flinched as lightning lit up the sky weakly and thunder rolled slightly farther away.

"Just the lightning and thunder...I always have been."

Joker chuckled again lifting her into his arms and carrying her back to the living room where he set her on the couch before using her phone flashlight to locate the candles she'd placed around the area and lit them illuminating the living area with a warm glow making her give a small smile as she wiped her eyes on her sleeve watching as he came back to the couch and sat down pulled her into his lap placing a kiss to the top of her head as she snuggled against him.

"You don't need to be scared anymore, nothing will hurt you, I won't let anything hurt you."

Harley gave a small smile nuzzling his shoulder as her arms curled against his chest closing her eyes.

"You promise?"

He ran his hand through her hair as the thunder rolled again smiling as she didn't even notice.

"Yeah, I promise."


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: Hey babies! Thank you all so much for reading and reviewing! If you guys have suggestions PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE feel free to leave them for me! I'm glad everyone is enjoying my stories it makes staying up late when ideas hit all worth it so thank you everyone! And a special thank you to Juneychan for the prompt for this chapter, I hope I do it justice and that you enjoy!**

 **Prompt: wrecking havoc to others but remain psychotically sweet to each other.**

 **My Little Sugar Queen.**

It was Halloween night in Gotham city and the witching hour had just rolled over the city, children had long since returned home from trick or treating and gone to bed but the city was far from quiet as a sleek purple Lamborghini tore through the streets leaving explosions, destroyed cars, and an occasional terrified pedestrian in its wake. A bone chillin set of laughs echoed through the mayhem from the car as grenades painted like jack-o-lanterns were thrown out by a slim pale hand with manicured red nails. Harley laughed wildly tossing another explosive out the window watching it land in the open window of a car before it blew up making her lean back into her seat rolling her tongue over a pink and blue swirled lollipop as she looked beside her where Joker was smiling just as evilly as her his ringed fingers clutched around the Lamborghini's steering wheel as his eyes darted from the road, to the destruction behind them to her and repeat.

Harley pulled the sucker from between her lips with a satisfying pop drawing his eyes to her as she rolled her tongue over her lips leaning closer to him so her hand was on his thigh.

"That was fun puddin' but I wanna dance, please daddy?"

She gave him her best pout making him cackle letting go of the wheel with one hand to grab the back of her neck and kiss her harshly making her purr then sit back in her seat as he let go of her returning his attention to the road.

"Anything ya want doll."

Harley smiled victoriously placing the sucker between her lips again as she watched the city fly by. Once they reached the club and snuck in the back Harley sat herself on the white leather sofa of the VIP booth holding a bag in her lap sifting through it with a contemplative look on her face, Joker sat beside her draping his arm over her shoulder looking at the bag's contents raising an eyebrow.

"All that candy is gonna give ya a cavity sweet cheeks."

Harley smiled at his comment rolling her eyes as she took out a bright green lollipop and placed it between her lips turning her eyes to his.

"But I can't help it, it's so sweet."

Joker chuckled grabbing her wrist and pulling the candy away replacing it with his own lips making her giggle then purr as his tongue trailed over her lower lip tasting the flavor left behind by the sucker. He gave a low growl in his chest as the slightly sour green apple mixed with the bubblegum lip gloss on her lips, he broke the kiss keeping his eyes on hers as she giggled putting the sucker back between her lips and getting to her feet as one of the henchmen escorted a man into the room. Harley walked around the back of the couch being sure to make her heels click on the floor as her eyes raked over the client while the nails of her free hand lightly scraped across the sofa until they reached Joker's shoulder. She leaned forward resting her chin on his shoulder and her hand on his chest smirking to herself as the other man tried to look annoyed but was having trouble keeping his eyes off her cleavage peeking out of the three open buttons of her navy button down.

Joker could see where the man's eyes were and smirked bringing his hand back to trail down Harley's neck then slowly move down to her cleavage pulling a giggle and a purr from her as she pressed her chest into his hand.

"So what is this I'm hearin' from my guys on the west end, about you not makin' your payments. I don't work for free, if you want to keep that dirt business of yours from bein' found out you'll cough up what you owe."

The man started sweating bullets as he scratched the back of his hand looking anywhere but the couple in front of him, Harley watched him closely before smirking leaning close to Joker's ear biting her lip as it pressed his hand more firmly against her breast.

"He ain't got the money puddin', look how he's twitchin' he spent the whole lot else where."

Joker glanced first at her then back of the man a smirk growing on his face, there were times he loved the glimpses of Harleen that shone through Harley especially at times like this when it meant the funnest outcome. The man was stammering trying to force out some pathetic lie but suddenly stopped when Harley let out a breathy giggle as Joker took his hand away but held her's as she walked around the couch so she could sit in his lap the man's eyes following her.

"Ya see Jerry it's like this, a pathetic little man like you doesn't pay then I can't afford to keep my queen here happy and when she isn't happy well...how does that old sayin' go kitten?"

Harley giggled pulling her sucker from her lips with a pop wrapping her arms around his neck.

"Happy queen happy king,"

She looked over at the man her smile falling into a pout as she looked at Joker mischief in her eyes.

"Does this mean no more fun puddin'?"

Joker returned her pout gently taking her chin in his hand brushing his thumb over her lips.

"I'm afraid not baby, not unless ol' Jerry here pays his debts in one way or another."

Jerry seemed to perk up a little looking slightly less nervous.

"I-I swear I can have the money in a week!"

Joker's face turned deathly serious and cold as he locked eyes with Jerry his hand resting on the small of Harley's back.

"Tell me kitten can you go a week without your spoils?"

Harley looked down at him almost like a child being told they could only have one toy.

"What would I lose?"

Joker pretended to think.

"Well daddy wouldn't be able to treat you to nights on the town, no more new dresses every time we go out and no more candy."

Harley's eyes went comically wide as she shook her head.

"No not my sweets! Oh puddin' I'll be just miserable without them!"

Joker cupped her cheek with one hand then grabbing the sack on the couch beside him setting it on her lap taking out a piece at random smirking when it was a bright red cinnamon candy, he unwrapped it holding it to her lips smiling as she obediently took it and the tips of his fingers in her mouth slowly pulling away smiling. Joker turned his eyes back to Jerry a fake sympathetic look as he nudged Harley to stand as he got to his feet.

"A week just isn't soon enough Jer, I'm afraid ya leave me no other choice."

Jerry looked at them terrified as Joker lifted the hem of Harley's shimmering silver dress revealing her garter belt and a hidden pocket pistol which he removed handing to Harley who smiled like the cat that are the canary as she aimed it between Jerry's eyes letting her own slip closed as Joker's hand gripped her thigh and his lips met her ear.

"At least he'll get to see something beautiful before he dies. Now take the shot."

Harley smiled and pulled the trigger hitting her mark between the man's eyes without looking as she dropped the gun and turned wrapping her arms around Joker's neck kissing him, he wrapped his arms around her waist smirking against her lips as the cinnamon candy added a tingling heat to the kiss.


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: Hello again babies! Once again thank you for all the reviews and support! I'm still accepting any requests as to what you guys would like to read, with that said a special thank you goes out to Juneychan once again for requesting this chapter, I hope I can meet your expectations and make a great chapter! Thank you all once again now let's get started!**

 **Prompt: Something bitter/sour.**

 **Don't leave me.**

It should have been a simple job, go in steal the cash and get back out without getting seen or caught easy as a daydream. Harley stood in the lobby of Gotham First National Bank twirling her bat in her hand as she looked at the tied up people and tellers grinning widely as she strutted around her heels clicking on the marble floor making anyone she walked near flinch, all but one. A man tied up to one of the large marble columns by colorful rope merely looked up at her icily making her pause a few steps past him and walk backwards to stand in front of him her bat on her shoulder as she popped her chewing gum.

He wasn't anything special just some business stiff with brown hair, childish features, green eyes and dressed from head to toe in a navy business suit. She let her head fall to the side as he leered at her and in return she popped her gum again before smiling.

"What's the matter cutie? Not havin' fun?"

The man met her eyes shaking his head.

"You'll never get away with this you know. No good criminals like you and that clown freak, you'll be caught by Batman and thrown into Arkham for the rest of your pathetic lives."

Harley's smile dropped as she straightened herself looming over the man.

"Oh really? Arkham is a joke and the King of all jokes has broken out of there more times than he's been in! As for Batman don't make me laugh the stupid bat ain't gonna waste his time and if he does then it'll be his funeral."

She smirked expecting a reaction from the man but all she got was a cold leer before suddenly the ropes dropped and her bat was yanked from her hands.

"Hey! Give that back ya jerk!"

Before she could even reach for the bat he swung it hard and it collided with her head sending her to the ground. She landed on the cold marble a small trail of blood running down the side of her head as she pushed herself up but what made the man take a step back and drop the bat was her laughing. She was laughing like a mad woman as she got to her feet staggering a little as she looked at him.

"Ooh so the boy wants ta play with the big kids huh? Alright let's play!"

In a blink she hand him by the front of his shirt and punched him a few times until his lip was busted and his eyes were black before she pushed him back stepping back a few paces she did a series of back hand springs and ended with kicking the guy under his chin sending him flying back and slamming into the column he'd been tied too where he slumped to the floor out cold. Harley smirked before black spots started filling her vision as her head spun and pounded, using her bat as a crutch she closed her eyes trying to stop it but the sound of a gun being cocked made her open them and look up to find the man standing before her aiming the gun at her.

"One less criminal for this city to worry about you crazy bitch."

To dizzy and disoriented to move Harley couldn't dodge the bullet as it was fired at her and pierced her right through her chest making her gasp with wide eyes doubling over blood rising in her throat and spilling over her lips as she coughed. Joker heard the gunshot from where he was supervising the vault clean out and growled.

"Hurry up! Move I don't want a single note left behind!"

The men worked quickly shoving stacks of money into bags until there was nothing left and retreated out the back to the vans waiting in the alley. Joker turned to look in the lobby's direction.

"Harley let's blow this popsicle stand!"

He listened for the sound of her laugh or her heels or anything signifying she was coming but heard nothing. Growling he moved to the lobby looking around at all the hostages his eyes falling on the man holding a gun covered in blood looking frozen and wide eyed at the floor, following his eyes Joker found Harley laying in a mess of matted blonde curls, a stained once white and red baseball jersey style shirt, red short shorts, black heels and blood lots of blood. He clenched his jaw as his vision turned red his eyes snapping back to the man holding the gun.

"You shot her?!"

The man jumped dropping the gun looking terrified but got no time to react before Joker pulled his gun and emptied the clip into the man's head. The man dropped to the ground as Joker knelt beside Harley gently gathering her in his arms.

"Harls? Come on baby wake up."

Harley's blue eyes fluttered open as she looked at him giving a weak smile.

"P-puddin'."

Her voice was weak, hardly a whisper, and garbled as blood rose in her throat again spilling out the corner of her mouth as she worked to breath. Joker brushed her hair away from her face trying to smile but it was broken.

"You'll be okay, we'll get ya back home and fix you up good as new."

Harley let her smile turn into a grimace as it became difficult and painful to breath but lifted her hand to his cheek her smile somewhat returning.

"I-I'm sorry puddin', I w-wasn't careful."

Joker shook his head stroking her cheek.

"Shh don't talk kitten, just stay awake for me okay?"

Harley gave him an apologetic look before coughing harshly splattering blood over them both before she took a raspy breath.

"I l-love you M-Mr. J."

As the last word left her lips the light left her eyes and it felt like a knife just lodged itself in his chest.

"No! Harley wake up!"

He held her face in his hands not wanting to believe she was dead but as it set in the pain in his chest got worse making tears fill his eyes without his knowing as they rolled down his cheeks. With shaking hands he laid her on her back on the cold marble, carefully folded her hands on her stomach, gently closed her eyes and placed a last kiss on her forehead lingering a long moment before forcing himself away hearing sirens getting closer. Later that evening he sat in the living room of the penthouse apartment a bottle of vodka on the table half gone and the tv playing the news as he watched it unseeing, until the story about the bank robbery came up.

"In highly anticipated news this evening the full story about the robbery of Gotham First National earlier this evening. Around 7:56 tonight police received an alarm that the bank was broken into and hostages were taken, the security cameras show the infamous Joker, his accomplice Harley Quinn and about twenty other men breaking into the bank before they were shut off. When police arrived they were shocked by what they found, all the hostages tied up but one Richard Matthews who was dead after being shot several times in the head."

The woman explained showing the security video the last thing being seen was Harley aiming her gun at the camera before it went dark. The man sitting next to the female anchor shook his head as he shuffled papers in his hands.

"And that's not all, also discovered was Quinn's body laid out almost ceremoniously in the center of the lobby. No autopsy was needed to identify the cause of Quinn's death, a gunshot wound to her chest as well as a blow to the head from her own baseball bat. The Joker was nowhere to be found nor was there any sign of the stolen money."

Joker growled turning the tv off and leaned over the table holding his head in his hands as the image of Harley laying lifeless in his arms burned behind his eyelids. He was pulled from the image by the sound of crying coming from the master bedroom making him take a deep breath and get to his feet walking to the room.

"What's the matter princess?"

He walked over to the baby bassinet set up against the wall beside Harley's side of the bed and carefully lifted out a tiny baby girl with a little fuzz of blonde hair and teary blue eyes. The girl looked up at him whimpering before crying again. He lightly kissed her forehead walking to the foot of the bed and sitting down holding her.

"You know something's wrong don't you? You know your mother isn't here."

The girl stopped crying looking up at him again her little hand gripping his finger. He looked her over and the pain in his chest burned again as he took in how much her features already made her look like Harley before he pissed her head again closing his eyes.

Joker's eyes flew open a cold sweat pouring over him and clinging to his skin as he sat up eyes darting around the dark room. A sound beside him made his eyes snap over and his breath leave him as he found Harley beside him watching him as she rubbed her eye then sat up.

"What's the matter puddin'?"

When he didn't respond she reached out and placed a hand to his cheek.

"Ya look like you saw a ghost puddin'."

Feeling the warmth of her touch he closed his eyes turning his head to press his lips to her palm taking in her warmth before opening his eyes pulling her into his lap and burying his face in the crook of her neck relaxing a little as he found she was solid and her scent fill him. Harley blinked confused before running her fingers through his hair.

"Shhh, it's okay I'm right here."

His arms tightened around her until she felt warm drops hitting her shoulder making her move away enough to look at him and see he was crying.

"It's okay Mr. J, I'm right here look, I'm here you can feel me and I'm not going anywhere I swear."

Joker took her face in his hands pressing their foreheads together for a long moment then softly kissed her emptying his heart into the kiss. She rested her hands on his shoulders kissing back keeping her forehead to his as they broke apart.

"It'll be okay, it was just a dream I swear."

Joker nodded relaxing a little as he laid down holding her close running his fingers through her hair as she rested her head on his chest tracing his tattoos. He kissed her head lingering making her smile returning the kiss to his chest over his heart.

"I love you Harley."

Harley smiled brighter cuddling closer.

"I love you too puddin'."


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: Hey babies! Sorry for no double update or a top quick update, I had a wedding and reception to go too and wasn't able to write but hopefully now I'll have a little more time! I'm still open to requests so don't be shy feel free to drop one in a review or message! Thank you to 'Guest' for requesting this chapter and thank you all for reading!**

 **Prompt: Harley tells Joker she's pregnant.**

 **Birds and Bees, Two into Three.**

Harley had practically paced a whole in the floor of the bathroom, she swore the floor felt lower anyway, but it didn't stop her feet from moving in the same pattern, 1, 2, 3, 4, 5 turn, 1, 2, 3,4, 5 turn and repeat, it'd been the same pattern for nearly an hour as she tapped the little plastic stick on her fingers chewing her lip raw. Finally feeling her legs grow tired she sat down on the edge of the claw foot tub setting the stick in her lap then running her fingers through her hair letting out a sigh long enough it could have came from her toes.

She heard the front door close and the familiar sound of Joker calling her name making her stomach turn over as she jumped up panicking slightly and shoving the little stick in between some wash cloths on the sink before quickly pulling her hair from her pigtails and straightening her red button down how she knew he liked and exited the bathroom smiling as she padded down the hall to the living area.

"Welcome back puddin'!"

Joker smiled at her closing his arms around her as she jumped at him making her giggle.

"Everythin' go okay? Ol' Pengy didn't give ya any trouble did he?"

Joker clipped her on the backside as he went to the kitchen opening the fridge and taking out two grape sodas sliding her one as she sat at the counter.

"No more than normal, wouldn't stop making a comment about how I 'didn't have my pretty little bird of paradise on my arm.'"

Harley snorted a laugh trying not to blow the fizzy grape drink out her nose at Joker's impression of penguin making him smile. Once she was sure she could talk without choking or spitting soda she twirled her straw between her fingertips.

"Did ya win any rounds? I know how much that fat bird brain cheats and Two Face with that coin of his, ya know he uses it as a mirror to see other people's hands!"

Joker smiled walking around the counter placing his hands on her hip making her smile.

"Careful baby your doctor is showing."

Harley giggled rolling her eyes but purred as he kissed her cheek.

"Now go and get ready, the club opens in an hour."

Harley smiled stealing a quick kiss before going back to the master bedroom and into the connected bathroom starting the shower as she stripped off her clothes. She was in the process of washing her hair when the sound of the door opening made her open her eyes and hiss as shampoo got into them, letting the water wash them out she pushed the door open enough to hold her hand out.

"Puddin' can ya hand me a washcloth, damned soap in my eyes."

There was a chuckle making her shake her head but smile as he handed her the cloth but with her head under the water she didn't hear the clicking of plastic hitting the sink then floor. Joker heard the sound and looked down expecting to find her toothbrush, which she normally left laying around haphazardly, but as he picked up the white stick he found it to be no toothbrush. He looked it over reading the writing on it, one line not pregnant two lines pregnant, he felt something between anger and worry bubble in his stomach as he looked at the small window then his body went numb seeing two little pink lines.

He was so focused on the test that he didn't hear the shower shut off or Harley step out and grab a towel to start drying her hair. Harley looked at his back as he stood rigid looking at something she couldn't see leaving her confused as she wrapped her hair up in the towel and stepped up behind him placing her hands on his shoulders but removing them when he growled and whirled around grabbing her throat.

"What is this?!"

Harley started asking what he was talking about but her eyes quickly focused on the pregnancy test being held in his other hand. Her heart sink to her feet and tears filled her eyes yet she forced a small smile.

"Surprise?"

Joker growled again letting her go faster than if he'd touched hot metal and threw the test into the sink before stalking out of the room. Harley let her smile fall as she covered her face with her hands tears spilling over, through her tears she heard drawers being ripped open and clothes going flying making her heart shatter, this was it he was going to kick her out for good. She forced herself to her feet, tears still streaming down her face as she pulled her hair from the towel and dried off before pulling on her sweatpants and a white t-shirt then stepping out into the bedroom.

She looked around seeing clothes on the floor, drawers yanked from both their dressers but rather than him stuffing her things into a bag she was surprised to find Joker sitting on his side of the bed, eyes closed and messing with something in his hands. Biting her lip she tiptoed over to the bed looking beside him her throat tight as she seen her plastic case of birth control pills with the odd one or two surrounded by empty ones on one side. She worked to swallow, it was as if she didn't take them on purpose she tended to forget them then there was the time she'd lost them for two days. Turning her eyes back to him she carefully sat down on her side of the bed so her back was to his as she pulled her knees to her chest hugging them.

"I'm sorry Mr. J, I-I didn't know until today and I didn't know how to tell ya. It ain't like I didn't take the pills on purpose, I just forget sometimes then there was the time I lost them for two days-"

Her ramblings were cut off when he looked at her over his shoulder taking in how small and scared she looked making his chest tighten and a sigh leave his lips as he pulled her around into his lap holding her close lightly resting what he'd been messing with on her lap. Harley felt the soft fabric on her skin and opened her eyes lifting it to examine, in her hands she held a little blue baby onesie making her heart skip a beat as she looked at him confused. He placed a kiss to her temple breathing her in as he closed his eyes.

"Harley, I'm not mad at you. I just...I…"

Harley set the onesie down moving so she was cupping his face her forehead to his.

"Shhh, it's okay Mr. J. Ya don't have to say it."

He opened his eyes meeting her eyes, the same eyes that nearly made him want to spill his guts to her the first time they met in Arkham, eyes that were comforting and understanding, full of nothing but love and patience and devotion to him. He wrapped his arms around her middle a little more careful than normal but still held her close kissing her softly. She responded in kind but pulled back a little feeling something warm and wet slide down her finger on his cheek, looking closer she found a lone tear making her heart squeeze.

"What if we lose this one too?"

Harley met his eyes giving a small smile.

"We won't, I'm sure we won't. Besides the last time we weren't ready, at all."

Joker grimaced at the memory of how rough their relationship was back then but what had helped change it was her falling to the ground clutching her stomach as blood ran down her legs at the feet of Robin the boy blunder. How both Batman and the brat paid dearly for that one, the feel of Harley's head on his shoulder snapped him out of his head making him look down to find her sleeping against his shoulder the onesie held to her chest between them. A smile crossed his lips as he carefully moved enough to lay her down then lay beside her holding her close to him running his fingers through her hair.

"I'll make sure nothing happens this time."

At his words she snuggles closer making him chuckle and hold her closer as sleep overtook him.


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N: Hey babies! Thank you all so so so soooo much for reviews and all the love you've given this story! Please continue to send your requests in I'd be more than happy to write them out for you! Thank you to Heartlauren for requesting this chapter! I hope you enjoy and once again please feel free to send in your requests!**

 **MY Puddin'!**

Harley clutched her hands right over her mouth desperate to keep what little air she had left trapped but as the surface of the cold dark water rose higher and higher it was impossible. Feeling her arms go numb she let them float to her side the last of her breath floating up to the surface in silver dancing bubbles. As her vision began going dark her mind wondered how she'd gotten into this mess in the first place.

-Earlier that night-

Harley was standing in front of her full length mirror swaying to the music pounding up through the floor from the club as she applied her lipstick, when t was done she tossed the tube onto the bed and straightened up fluffing her curls and smoothed her new dress. It was a dress she'd picked out special during her and Joker's last date night while robbing the mall, it was a shimmering silver cocktail dress that reached her mid-high with a low neckline and one shoulder, she'd paired it with a pair of strappy silver heels, a diamond bracelet, a silver ring cuff on her bicep, and her 'Puddin' collar.

Blowing a kiss to her reflection she smiled and left the bedroom heading for the club. The club was alive and thriving with people dancing, drinking, playing cards, and watching girls on the various stages dance. Her smile widened as she strutted her way to the bar turning heads as she did, the queen had entered her kingdom and she reveled in the attention thrived on it. She tapped on the bar twice and the man behind it set her drink in front of her with a nod and a stiff 'miss Quinn.' making her giggle as she sipped her favorite bubble gum martini and looked around the club. Things were really in swing and the energy in the room was through the roof telling her it was the perfect time to make a scene.

Setting her glass down she hopped off her stool and made her way to her cage pulling herself up, seeing her enter the glass box the DJ quickly changed the music to her playlist earning a few shouts and growls from some of the club goers before their attention was turned to her and they forgot about anything else. Harley lost herself in her dancing pulling moves most thought impossible including her famous hanging upside down from the chain in the middle of the cage. While she was upside down she opened her eyes looking up at the VIP booth expecting Joker's eyes to be on her like they always were but what she found nearly made her fall head first from the chain.

Joker was in his VIP booth talking with some man but that didn't bother her because it was normal but what made her blood boil was the brunette woman sitting on his lap running her hands over his shoulders and back. Letting out an animalistic snarl she flipped herself around landing hard on her feet and stepped out of her box, seeing the deadly look on her face most of the crowd separated for her and the few that didn't she shoved them out of her way not caring if she hurt them or not, they should be grateful she didn't shoot their brains out. She stalked up to the office silencing Frost's warning that Joker was busy with a single glare before slamming the door open making a loud thud as it hit the wall.

All eyes turned to her, the man looked even more terrified now at the entrance of the clown queen, the woman in Joker's lap had eyes the size of dessert plates as she clung to Joker who only smiled at her.

"Ahh there she is! My Harley girl!"

Harley walked into the room to stand in front of Joker her eyes narrowing at the other woman as she crossed her arms.

"Hi puddin'."

She made no effort to hide her anger making the woman flinch turning her her green eyes to Joker.

"Who the hell is she?!"

Joker only laughed reaching out to pull Harley down beside him but she quickly smacked his hand away making his smile vanish and a growl rumble from his chest.

"Not now kitten, daddy is busy. Go dance or something."

Harley gave a snarl of her own.

"No!"

Joker was getting angry and she could see it as his eyes bore into her's his jaw clenched.

"Get out before I scoop those pretty little eyes outta your head."

All Harley's anger drained away leaving shock and a tinge of fear as tears sprang to her eyes and she slowly backed away. All three pairs of eyes followed her until she ran from the booth and back up to the apartment. She paced around the kitchen tears flowing down her cheeks, sure he'd threatened her before but nothing like that and definitely never in front of anyone like clients. Her eyes landed on the rack containing several pairs of keys, biting her lip she listened to the buzz of voices in her head that seemed to be divided between running or staying until one voice cut through it all.

'Run.'

Harley nodded scrubbing her tears away with the back of her hand grabbing the first keys her hands touched, kicked off her heels and ran to the garage. She pressed the button on the keys and found the corresponding vehicle, an inconspicuous black car, and got in starting it before peeling out of the garage. As she was driving through the streets tears started blurring her vision again as the voices that had wanted her to stay kept screaming for her to go back and forcing images of all the tender moments between her and Joker before her.

She didn't know the car was starting to swerve as she furiously wiped her eyes.

"Stop! Shut up!"

But the voices kept going morphing their tones to mimic Joker's telling her to turn around.

"I SAID SHUT UP!"

Suddenly the voices went silent and she gasped turning the wheel hard seeing the car speeding right for the barrier between the road and river but the car had too much speed and nose dived into the cold water. Somehow she'd managed to break the window and get out but as the cold water surrounded her the reminder that she couldn't swim was like a slap to the face as she slowly started sinking.

-Present-

Black was pulled at her vision as water filled her lungs weighing her down when she could swear something broke the surface but with her water logged mind she wasn't sure. Her eyes closed ready to let the water take her when suddenly she was grabbed and pulled back to the surface where she started sputtering coughing up water, when she was set on the shore she hacked up more water then looked around for who saved her expecting Batman or some civilian but when she seen Joker laying beside her gasping to catch his own breath her heart froze for a few beats.

"What the hell were you thinkin'?!"

Harley looked down tears filling her eyes.

"I wasn't tryin' ta drown myself Mr. J I swear, I just saw you with a mother woman and when ya threatened me I let the voices control me and...and I left but the other voices wouldn't stop and I got distracted and drove off the road!"

Her body was shaking now as sobs escaped her the fear of being a breath away from death finally coming over her. Joker looked at her growling, he wanted to be angry at her for making him think she'd actually been stupid enough to believe he'd betrayed her but at the same time he couldn't because he knew he got the same way whenever another man so much as looked at her but the only difference was he could threaten her and she'd back down where she'd try to do that to him and he'd laugh.

Getting to his feet he walked over to her and gathered her in his arms bridal style carrying her back to the road.

"Stop crying Harley. I wasn't trying to replace you, she was the daughter of the client and to make him think he was in good I had to play the cards right. They're both dead in the club."

Harley sniffled looking up at him her blue eyes wide and disbelieving.

"W-what?"

Her climbed into the back of the black van signaling for Frost to drive as he held her in his lap grabbing a towel from the seat draping it over her head.

"I said they are both dead. No one could replace you Harl, you are mine."

Harley slowly let a smile cross her lips as she wrapped her arms around his neck relaxing as his arms held her tight.

"My puddin'."

Joker kissed her head sighing.

"My Harley baby."


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N: Hey babies! Thanks for reading all of you as always! Please if you have a request, anything, please feel free to leave it in a review! Hope you enjoy this chapter! Thanks to Becca3012 for requesting this chapter!**

 **Prompt: Harley losing the first baby.**

 **I will love you always.**

Harley sat on the silk covered bed, her feet propped up on a small pile of satan covered pillows, her back against her own silk cased pillows, her head against the headboard as she hummed to herself her hands messing with a little item of pastel blue clothing. She lifted the garment into her line of sight opening her eyes to look it over, a small baby onesie, tears filled her eyes as she hugged it close to her chest closing her eyes again letting memories flood her.

~2 years earlier~

Harley lay on her back in the middle of the living room floor smiling like a mad woman her fingers tracing light patterns on her stomach giggling. She'd found out a month ago she was almost two months pregnant and to her surprise Joker wasn't against the idea at all, if anything he was just as happy, she was currently waiting for him to return from a meeting down stairs so they could go out and celebrate by causing trouble and stealing a few things for the room currently being turned into a nursery. She gave a happy squeak as she pushed herself up on her elbows peeking down the hall where she could barely see a few henchmen painting the room. Getting to her feet she went to the kitchen humming to herself as she opened a can of grape soda sipping from it.

Finally Joker entered the apartment looking around until his eyes found her and he smiled.

"Are you ready to cause trouble kitten?"

She nodded excitedly as she skipped to his side beaming, he chuckled kissing her hand before leading her down to the garage and helped her into the purple Lambo, closing the door when she was in before going around to the driver side and getting in. Things were going perfectly, they'd robbed plenty of stores without getting caught by Gotham's boys in blue and we're now terrorizing the streets with Batman and Robin on their tail, they were starting to get on Joker's nerves as without realizing it they'd backed them into a corner forcing him to stop the car before smashing it into a dead end wall.

Harley let out a shriek as Batman smashed the driver window and pulled Joker out slamming him onto the ground, she opened her door trying to get out and help but Robin was blocking her making her growl and reach into the car grabbing the first weapon her fingers touch smiling wickedly seeing it was her bat. She swung it at his head but to her shock the boy wonder grabbed it and yanked it from her hands jabbing the base into her torso making her eyes go wide as all the air left her lungs and she fell to her knees.

Tears sprang to her eyes as her arms shakily wrapped around her middle before she felt it, warm and wet running down her leg. Reaching a shaking hand down she touched the feeling on her thigh and pulled her hand away giving an ear piercing scream seeing her fingers dyed crimson. Joker had seen it all as Batman tried to pin him but hearing Harley scream they both froze for a moment before Joker snarled delivering a solid punch to Batman's jaw then repeatedly to his chest and gut until he was sure the bat wouldn't get up for a few minutes before he ran to Harley ignoring Robin as she gathered her into his arms their bodies shaking with her sobs as she clutched onto his shirt for dear life.

"It's gone! I can feel it! He killed it!"

Joker quietly hushed her turning his icy glare on Robin who started backing away dropping the baseball bat shaking his head stammering out how he didn't know but it wasn't going to save him. Grabbing the dropped wooden bat Joker knocked the boy wonder out with a solid hit to the head dragging him to the car and throwing him in after making sure his hands and legs were tied then carefully helped Harley into the car. When they returned home the goons took Robin down to the meat locker while Joker carried Harley up to the master bedroom holding her as she sobbed clutching her middle.

He laid her in the bed sitting beside her brushing her hair away from her face as she slowly stopped sobbing but still sniffled and shook.

"Do you want a pill?"

Harley rose her eyes to him and nodded slowly making him nod and rise from the bed going to the bathroom, he came back seconds later with a glass of water and a little pink pill handing them to her. She gave a weak thanks before swallowing the pill chasing it with a quick drink before handing the glass back watching as he set it on the nightstand then lightly stroked her hair as her eyes started to slip closed. When they finally did a calm darkness wrapped around her pushing away every and all thoughts while Joker went down and made sure Robin paid for what he'd done then sent the message to Batman by telling his goons to send the body to the GCPD.

~Preasant~

Harley opened her eyes hearing the door quietly open then close as Joker came into the bedroom sitting beside her giving her a smile.

"How are ya feeling kitten?"

Harley gave a small smile placing her hand on her very swollen stomach.

"We're fine puddin'."

He kissed her temple placing his hand over her's making her smile widen as he took the onesie from her looking it over.

"Think she'll be able to wear this?"

Harley giggled and nodded.

"Oh I'm sure she will, and she'll look adorable in it."

Joker chuckled placing a soft kiss to her lips making her purr and kiss back before pulling away wincing a little at the harsh kick in her middle. Seeing her discomfort Joker placed his hand over her bump gently rubbing his thumb over the thin fabric of the nightgown she was wearing watching as she slowly relaxed her smile returning.


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N: Thank you once again to everyone reading and reviewing! Thank you to 'jkjustobsessing' for requesting this chapter! Enjoy!**

 **Prompt: Lucy has a nightmare.**

 **Sweet Dreams.**

Lucy Arleen Quinn wasn't a girl to get scared easily even at 5 years old, but then again when you're the daughter of the two most well known criminals in all of Gotham, the king and queen of crime themselves, you learn not to be afraid quick. But tonight was the exception as she lay tossing and turning in her bed whining as she was trapped in her nightmare.

The dream had started out fine with her tagging along with her parents on one of their 'nights on the town' as her mother called them having a great time but things turned dark as Batman showed up forcing them into a corner, before her eyes Batman grabbed her father and they began fighting both taking and landing blows but it was clear Batman had the upper hand as he finally slammed Joker to the ground, Harley was standing between Batman and Lucy gun drawn and tears streaming her cheeks.

"Stay back! I'm not gonna let you touch her!"

But Batman didn't listen he just grabbed the gun, threw it to the side and with a loud snap broke her arm making her scream loudly her tears rolling faster but she refused to go down as she started kicking trying to keep him from reaching Lucy but with a sharp blow to the head she fell to the ground unconscious. Lucy cowered away tears rolling down her cheeks to scared to move meaning she soon found herself being picked up and carried away from her parents beaten and bleeding forms. She started screaming an ear piercing scream kicking and hitting doing anything to get away only stopping when she felt a sting in her shoulder before things went black.

"Lucy!"

The sound of her mother's voice made her stop and open her eyes. She was back in her room her mother sitting beside her looking panicked and worried despite being dressing in only her silk robe. Lucy started crying and threw herself into her mother's arms making Harley sigh but hold her tight kissing her head.

"It's okay baby, it was only a dream. Do you wanna sleep with momma?"

Lucy nodded wrapping her arms around her leck locking her legs around her waist earning another sigh but a smile. Lucy let herself be carried to the master bedroom then laid on the black silk sheets in the middle of the bed as Harley got in beside her. The movement made Joker open his eyes and give Harley a quick leer before noticing the tears on Lucy's cheeks.

"She had a bad dream puddin', she wants to sleep in here."

Joker didn't respond for a second before gently wiping Lucy's tears away.

"The bat again?"

Lucy nodded watching him as he shook his head.

"Don't worry Lucy, he's not going to take you away from us we won't let him."

As he spoke he tucked a strand of hair behind her ear cupping her cheek earning a small smile as her small hands grabbed his. Harley laid back down smiling as Lucy laid down between them still holding her father's hand falling asleep. Joker sighed looking at Harley finding her smiling.

"Her and these silly nightmares, as if we'd ever let bat-freak touch her."

Harley giggled but it turned into a yawn as her eyes started to close.

"They're just nightmares puddin'."

Her words trailed off as she fell asleep, he watched them for a few minutes before sighing.

"I won't let him lay a finger on either of my girls."


	9. Chapter 9

**A/N: PLEASE READ! Review are visible again! So please send in any requests you have for the master list! Also go check out my newest story 'Roses and Diamonds' PLEASE AND THANK YOU!**

 **Prompt: Harley's time of the month (guy readers may want to be weary!)**

 **Monthly visit**

Harley was rudely awakened by a rather harsh pain in her abdomen making her groan and roll over onto her stomach pinning her hands under her over her lower stomach trying to ease the pain and after a few seconds it dulled away making her sigh and pull her hands free to reach beside her feeling for Joker only to feel the sheets cold and empty. She huffed and rolled back over getting to her feet, once she was standing she felt something warm, wet and slightly sticky on her thigh making her look down and curse seeing blood smeared over her skin. She turned and looked at the lush purple sheets and really started cursing seeing a sizable spot on her side, taking a breath she gathered her calm enough to hurriedly clean herself off and get dressed before going back to the bed pulling the sheets off along with the blankets and pillow cases wadding them all up and dropping them by the door as she poked her head out listening to make sure Joker wasn't around before hauling the lot to the washer at the end of the hall and stuffing them in.

Once they were in and washing she sighed leaning on the wall the groaned as another wave of cramps hit her before passing, she stayed against the wall for a minute rubbing her eye and yawning unaware of footsteps coming closer to her in fact she wasn't aware she wasn't alone until her hand was pulled away from her eye and pinned beside her head making her blink her eyes open then smile finding Joker holding her captive.

"What in the world are you doin' up kitten? It's not even 10:00."

Harley tried to wiggle her hands free but couldn't making her giggle.

"I couldn't sleep no more puddin'."

Joker released her hands and placed a kiss to her neck pulling her close until one leg was around his waist making her bite her lip and flush, with her current state the normally arousing potion was nearly painful as it shifted her tampon uncomfortably. She gently pushed on his shoulders returning her feet so they were flat on the ground a blush covering her cheeks.

"You're bein' affectionate today Mr. J, maybe I should wake up earlier more often."

She smiled but he looked into her eyes bringing his hand up to her chin so she couldn't look away.

"I have a business meeting in Midway, I'll be gone all day and I wanted to make sure my Harley was all serviced. But there's something you're not telling me kitten."

Harley's flushed deepened as she flinched a wave of cramps washed over her.

"It ain't nothin' puddin' just a little red flag."

Joker looked at her before growling getting the message making her pout a little as he took his hand away.

"I'm sorry puddin', I can still-"

She was cut off when Joker took out his phone and sent a quick message out before sliding it back into his pocket gathering her in his arms. She laid her head on his shoulder letting her eyes close for a moment before opening looking up at him.

"What was that about puddin'? Tellin' Johnny to bring the car 'round?"

Joker shook his head before kissing her cheek leading her to the living room sitting on the couch pulling her into his lap.

"Nope, I told him to push the meeting aside I'm spending the day with my queen."

Harley felt a smile cross her lips til her cheeks hurt as she threw her arms around his neck.

"Awww puddin'!"

He rolled his eyes by smiled holding her close. After a while she was curled up beside him asleep with her head on his chest as his hand lightly massaged her abdomen the other holding his head in the palm as his elbow rested on the arm of the couch, he looked around the living room and chuckled to himself seeing the countless chocolate wrappers and other sweets scattered on the table with a bottle of low dose pain killers, cheesy romcom movies and their cases, and a few candid of grape soda.

Harley shifted in her sleep drawing his eye and making him smile as she managed to snuggle closer. He pulled the blanket back up over them from the floor then kissed her head letting his own eyes slip closed as sleep consumed him.


	10. Chapter 10

**A/N: Hey babies! Guess what?! We've hit double digits with this story's chapters! Thank you all so much for reading reviewing and requesting you've really made this collection go far! With the reviews back on feel free to request whatever your little hearts want! Speaking of requests this prompt has been asked for by SO many of you guys I can't put it off anymore so thank you for your requests!**

 **Prompt: Joker gets hurt.**

 **It's just a scratch.**

Harley yawned as she stretched out on the living room couch, it was past midnight and she was stuck inside wearing one of Joker's shirts, a pair of sweatpants, her favorite fuzzy socks and her platinum curls resting around her shoulders. She boredly flicked through the tv channels looking for something to watch, with Joker out on business the club wasn't open and because it was an important meeting she was made to stay at the penthouse where she wouldn't be a distraction, she stopped flicking through channels when she found an old horror movie.

First commercial break she got up and turned out all the lights except one of the kitchen counter lights, grabbed a few blankets and pillows, an arm full of grape sodas and an arm full of snacks before laying in the pile of blankets and pillows on the floor watching the movie. The movie was starting to get good, good and scary enough that Harley had abandoned her snacks in favors of holding the blankets tighter around her, when the door suddenly opened making her scream and jump to her feet grabbing the first thing that could be a weapon, even if that did happen to be a full can of soda, but lowered it hearing a familiar growl.

"Puddin'! Ya scared the sausages outta me! How'd things-"

Another growl it this one was forced.

"Shut up Harl, daddy isn't in the mood for your chatter."

Harley quickly snapped her mouth closed watching as he turned on the lights making her blink at the brightness. Once her eyes cleared they widened seeing his shirt soaked in blood and his hand clutching his side as he tore the kitchen apart looking for something.

"You're hurt Mr. J!"

He gave a sarcasm dipped laugh.

"Oh really? I hadn't noticed, it's just a scratch now where's that damned first aid kit?!"

Harley hurried into the kitchen and took the little kit from its place going to him as he slumped into one of the stools by the counter. After removing his shirt and and she examined the wound then looked back up at him.

"That's awful deep puddin', it's gonna need stitches, want me ta have Johnny get the doc?"

Joker growled shaking his head.

"Just patch it up before I pass out."

Harley nodded and dug in the kit for a second before taking out a pre-threaded needle and worked quickly sewing up the gash with practiced ease before slathering on antibiotic gel then bandaging it up.

"There all done puddin'! Guess this means you'll be takin' it easy for a while huh?"

Joker scoffed getting to his feet.

"I can't afford to take it easy, not when there are still deals to do, suckers to con and the Batman to take care of."

Harley put the first aid kit back watching him as he started for the door but had to stop leaning on the counter holding his side making her sigh and go to him placing a hand on his shoulder.

"Come on Mr. J, let's get you laid down so ya don't rip the stitches."

Joker huffed but let her lead him to the master bedroom and lay on the bed, she smiled kissing his cheek before disappearing from the room coming back with some pain killers and water.

"Here these'll help."

Joker took the pills and swallowed them dry before taking a drink from the glass then handing it back letting his head fall back against the headboard and his eyes close. Harley set the glass on the night stand before sitting on the edge of the bed gently running her fingers through his hair.

"What happened, I thought it was just a simple meeting?"

Joker leaned into her touch giving a sound like a growled purr making her smile.

"It was, we gained a whole new supply of weaponry to support a small military base, but as we were comin' back to the city I decided I was gonna do some window shoppin' and maybe find my queen a little gift but as I was grabbing that little gift the Bat decided to crash the fun! He came barging in and knocks me around but as always I slipped away until I realized he'd sliced me open with one of his stupid little toys."

Harley gave a sympathetic pout.

"That rotten ol' rat with wings! I hope ya made him pay for hurtin' ya puddin'!"

Joker laughed gently pinching her cheek making her smile.

"You bet I did kitten."

Harley giggled kissing his cheek.

"Ya need anythin' puddin'?"

Joker thought for a moment then smiled pulling her into his lap making her giggle but be mindful of his side as she rested her hands on his chest.

"I can think of somethin' I want."

Harley rolled her eyes but kissed him putting as he traced his tongue over her lip until she opened them letting him deepen the kiss as she pressed against him breaking the kiss to giggle as his hands gently but firmly grabbed her thighs. After stealing another quick kiss she removed herself standing beside the bed.

"Sorry puddin' but ya gotta get some rest so ya can heal up all nice."

Joker growled at her.

"Harley come back here before daddy gets mad."

Harley shook her head smirking.

"No."

Joker leered at her.

"What did you just tell me?!"

Harley put her hands on her hips.

"I said no, N-O no."

She giggled as it looked like Joker was ready to bust a blood vessel before she went to her side of the bed laying down gently resting her head on his chest. She felt him growl but slowly relax as he ran his fingers through her hair and eventually her breathing evened out making her smile before she let herself fall asleep.


	11. Chapter 11

**A/N: Hey babies! Soooo just when I thought the issue with reviews was fixed it happens again! It's getting frustrating and I'm not the only one with the issue a few of my favorite stories that I read have been put on hold because of the issue and it's not fun, but don't worry babies I plan to keep working through the issue (and spamming support with emails if that's what it takes) though updates maybe a bit slower please bare with me! Thanks babies!**

 **IMPORTANT NOTE!: this chapter is a little darker than the others so feel free to skip out if you want to while reading I'll understand just be careful.**

 **Prompt: Harley finally snaps**

 **Mr. J**

Dr. Joan Leland walked down the halls of Arkham spitting out generic words she'd memorized years ago to say to the new interns following her.

"Arkham Asylum is home to some of Gotham's most dangerous and notorious criminals, from characters as memorable as The Riddler or Joker to criminals deemed unfit for society. While you are interning here you will be observing the behavior and nature of these inmates through viewing sessions between them and their doctors, you will be asked to write reports about what you've observed and make your own opinions of what could be going on inside their twisted heads then they will be evaluated by myself. If you pass that point you will be given your own patients to examine, but I will warn you only a select number of interns have made it that far and only one since…."

Her voice trailed off as the group walked into the female inmates wing passing first Poison Ivy's cell which was littered with small plants while the redhead lounged on her cot paying no mind to the group, there were a few more but as they reached one the entire group stopped.

"Harleen Quinzel."

The group of about 4 interns all moved closer to the cell looking in not sure what to expect from the clown queen of crime, her hanging from something like a straight jacket from the ceiling like it was a hammock, fawning over some picture of the Joker, he maybe even not there at all having succeeded in escaping before they arrived, anything but what they were now seeing. Harley was sitting on the floor in a straight jacket rocking back and forth mumbling to herself looking just as crazy as the slobbering maniacs in the other cells with her platinum hair all matted and stringy, her ghostly white skin patched with bruises all that seemed to be self inflicted.

Joan looked in at the woman shaking her head. Harley had been her normal hyper self when she'd been brought in by Batman but after a week with no sign of Joker being brought in or coming to save her she'd started spiraling down wards but it was the day she'd seen the news broadcast claiming Joker to have perished during their fight with Batman that finally broke the last straw in her head and sent her into a tailspin of true insanity reducing her to what she was now. It had been slow and from what Joan could gather painful, she had suffered denial before seeing the news, anger the next few days at herself and Joker and Batman, her begging had been towards Joan to let her out and try to find Joker to know he wasn't really gone and now she was going through the roughest part, depression.

One of the interns looked at Joan tucking a strand of her blonde hair behind her ear.

"Is she going through some kind of withdrawal?"

Joan looked at the intern then back at Harley nodding.

"Yes she is miss Adams, she is going through withdrawals from the only thing she grisly cared about, The Joker. A drug she was addicted to for many years, he made her what she is, or used to be, and without him she believes her life has no meaning, even her fellow inmate Poison Ivy tried to bring her from her depression but it didn't help her at all it just forced her away from everyone else even farther."

The blonde woman looked back at Harley.

"So she's-"

"Completely insane and untreatable, which is exactly why none of you will have a chance of working with her, now if we continue down this way we will get you all set up in the observation room for your first viewing."

The blonde watched as the group left her behind before she looked at Harley stepping closer to the glass looking in biting her lip as she slipped something from her pocket and sliding it into the cell through one of the small holes letting it fall to the floor.

"She really misses you Harley, and don't worry I'll make sure she always knows who you are."

With that the blonde hurried after the group unaware that once she was out of sight Harley's mumbles stopped her blue eyes locked on the tiny object on the floor, a matchbox purple Lamborghini with a pink tutu on it, and a single coherent word left her chapped lips.

"Lucy."


	12. Chapter 12

**A/N: Hey babies! Thank you all so much for the favs, follows, reviews and requests they really make my day! This is another one requested by many of you so I hope you enjoy it and thank you all again!**

 **Prompt: Harley is sick**

 **Sick day.**

'How did it get to this point?'

Harley wondered to herself as she blew her sore nose for the millionth time in less than a half hour. She shivered pulling the blanket tighter around her letting out a sigh that turned into a coughing fit making her groan when it finally ended.

"Cough not getting any better?"

Harley looked at the door hearing it close to find Joker standing by it still dressed in his business clothes. She shook her head sniffling which resulted in another round of coughing visibly making Joker flinch. Two days now she'd been sick, of course the first day was slightly worse with throwing up anything that passed her lips and down her throat, ironically enough even the anti-nausea medicine hadn't stayed down. At least now she was keeping down water and crackers but she'd also picked up unforgiving coughing fits and a stuffy snot nose.

Joker moved to her side sitting on the edge of the bed pressing the back of his hand to her forehead then pulling it away as she sneezed into a tissue.

"You've still got a fever. You know if you'd take the medicine you would feel better."

Harley poured shaking her head.

"I'm not taking that nasty stuff! It's icky puddin'!"

Joker chuckled but rolled his eyes gently stroking her cheek watching as she closed her eyes, after making sure she was asleep he slipped out of the room and out of the apartment all together. Harley woke up 15 minutes later and grumbled seeing she was left alone again before she sat up shuddering as she pulled the blanket tighter around herself. After nearly an hour of sniffling, coughing and nose blowing the door finally opened to reveal Joker holding a bottle of some pink substance and a spoon making Harley cringe and hide under the blankets.

Joker rolled his eyes at her as he sat on the bed pulling the covers off her tiny frame.

"You need to take this kitten otherwise you'll never get better."

Harley shook her head clamping her mouth shut making Joker give a low growl, sure the girl couldn't shut her mouth most of the time when he wanted her to but now she was closing it when he needed her to open it. Shaking his head he twisted the cap off the bottle and poured a spoonful of the pink mix before setting the bottle aside.

"Come on Harl, don't make me force you."

Harley looked at him with childish begging eyes but he didn't budge making her whimper once then close her eyes and open her mouth. Seeing his opening Joker placed the spoon in her mouth and poured the liquid in then retracting it as she swallowed. Once the spoonful was out of her mouth Harley waited for the horrible taste but it never came as instead the sweet taste of bubblegum filled her mouth making her open her eyes and look at Joker surprised.

Joker laughed at her reaction setting the spoon aside and pulling her into her lap.

"If my queen refused to take her medicine because it tasted, what was the word you so elegantly used icky? Then I had the boys in the lab make something a little sweeter."

Harley smiled happily nuzzling his chest making him chuckle and hold her tight.

"Ya know puddin' the medicine helps some and all but I think just bein' with you and your arms around me help more."

Joker smiled kissing her head internally relaxing as he felt her fever had lowered. He readjusted her so his legs were stretched out on the bed and she was laying curled up beside him her head on his chest.

"Then if that's what makes you feel better faster I guess I'll have to stay here with you until you're all better again."

Harley giggled softly before slipping back to sleep feeling safe in his hold.


	13. Chapter 13

**A/N: Hey babies! Sorry for the felt in this story! I got caught up in the ending of 'Harley's New Start' and the beginning of 'Lucy's Kingdom' and kinda walked away from everything else for a bit and I apologize for it wholeheartedly! Hopefully I'll be able to get back on track with this story for you all! That said feel free to send in prompts and ideas as you please and I'll add them to the list! On that note thank you to Zakiyya and Becca3013 for sending in these prompts I hope you all enjoy!**

 **Prompt(s): Joker's reaction to first meeting their daughter -Zakiyya**

 **Lucy's birth -Becca3012**

 **My Girls.**

Joker sat on the edge of his and Harley's purple satin covered king sized bed his eyes focused on what he was holding in his arms, a smile on his lips, beside him Harley was asleep but smiling slightly propped against the pillows her chemically bleached hair a little matted by sweat was pushed away from her face and she had no makeup on for a change. In Joker's arms wrapped in a soft green blankets a newborn infant made a small nose drawing his attention from Harley to look down and find eyes that mirrored his own steely blue ones looking up at him.

"Cheeky little devil, I wasn't supposed to end up loving you as much as I do your mother but you've worked your way in already."

The infant simply looked at him not making a sound for a moment before it began making little gargles sounds little fingers closing around his index finger as he lightly poked its palm. Hearing the sounds Harley's eyes fluttered open taking a moment to take in the sight of Joker holding the baby before she smiled softly.

"You two gettin' along puddin'?"

Joker looked at her then down at the baby as it heard Harley and began kicking its legs earning a smile from both parents.

"Unfortunately it would seem."

Harley giggled carefully adjusting herself then holding out her arms for the baby.

"She's probably gettin' hungry, she didn't eat much before."

Joker carefully hand the girl over and watched as Harley's smile went soft and she gently cradled the infant to her softly humming. Joker watched for a few more seconds before getting to his feet, walking around the bed and gently kissing Harley's lips.

"Are you gonna be alright on your own for a few hours kitten?"

Harley returned the kiss then nodded.

"I'm sure we will puddin', you go and take care of business and we'll see ya when ya get back."

Joker chuckled kissing her again before setting her phone beside her and meeting her gaze.

"I'll leave Johnny up here for you in case and if you need me you have my number."

Harley giggled at the joke maki him smile as he left closing the door behind him. In his office Joker found himself distracted from his meetings by Harley and their daughter, currently his eyes were focused on the picture of him and Harley on his desk, something he wouldn't have kept if it hadn't been Harley that put it there on one of their anniversaries, the sound of the bumbling man across from him was just dull noise as his mind wondered. It wasn't supposed to be this way, they hadn't even talked about having kids before and yet when Harley came into his office while he was scribbling away at plans with teary eyes and the three positive pregnancy tests he found he couldn't hate the idea as much as he'd expected to.

Throughout Harley's eight month pregnancy he tried his hardest to act like he didn't care but he found himself slipping ever couple weeks always surprising her with something new, the first month it had been a bag of infant clothes in the colors of pink blue grey and black, the second month it was a porcelain harlequin doll with powder blue and white diamonds on its outfit, the fourth month it was a beautiful custom wooden crib. After learning they were having a girl during month five he had gotten more clothes ranging from little infant dresses to toddler clothes and one very special onsie that was lavender purple with lime green feet and sleeve cuffs but what made it special was the hand stitched words across it that read 'daddy's little devil'.

When month eight came around they had everything they needed for their little princess' arrival and Harley swore the baby knew it because a week later she decided she'd had enough time to grow and wanted out. The labor had gone well for the most part from what Joker guessed, he'd been forced to stay out of the room until their girl was born, and despite being a month early she was fine apart from needing a little extra help breathing for about an hour. Joker knew Harley was won over completely the second she learned she was carrying the girl but Joker knew he was screwed and now in love with two girls from the moment he watched Harley hold the wailing girl on her flushed chest with that teary smile on her lips as well as one word, Lucy.

Holding Lucy for the first time had only confirmed his notion as he found himself won over by newborn with his eyes and Harley's features. He was snapped from his thoughts by the feel of his phone vibrating in his pocket, pulling it out he read over the message from Harley and rolled his eyes letting a chuckle slip at the three simple words she'd typed 'I miss you'. His sudden chuckle made the man across from him nervous causing him to stutter drawing Joker's attention back to him his mind working as he silently chose weather to just leave or have some target practice. Slipping his phone back into his pocket he stood from the chair looking at the man, who dropped his eyes to the floor at once.

"It would seem my attention is needed else where, reschedule the meeting or don't I don't care."

The man was surprised by Joker's words and slightly angered having already been blown off by the clown prince three times making him growl and stand but he didn't get the chance to start yelling before Joker shot him clean between the eyes then walked from the office leaving the mess for the henchmen to clean up. Joker made his way back to the bedroom and smiled seeing Harley sitting in bed newly showered and in one of his shirts and her sweatpants smiling brightly with Lucy sleeping in the bassinet beside the bed. He went to the bed and sat beside her giving a growl like purr as she immediately snuggled against him kissing his cheek as he ran his hand through her hair.

"That was quick puddin', what made ya hurry?"

Joker smirked lightly kissing the tip of her nose, her rotten tattoo then her lips.

"My girl missed me."

She was about to kiss back when the sound of Lucy crying made her sigh and start to move but she paused when Joker kissed her cheek and got to his feet then walked around to the bassinet his smirk turning into a smile seeing she was now wearing her special onesie as he picked her up. As soon as she was cradled in his arms Lucy stopped crying and began making her little sounds again making Harley giggled. Joker placed a gentle kiss to Lucy's tiny forehead.

"My girls missed me."


	14. Chapter 14

**A/N: Hey babies! I'm so glad so many of you liked the last chapter! PLEASE keep sending in your ideas I love hearing suggestions and putting them into action and my master list has shrunk quite a bit so new ideas are welcomed! I hope you enjoy this chapter because let me tell you I died writing it and I'm in love with it!**

 **Prompt: Lucy steals Joker's purple alligator coat -author's prompt**

 **Little thief.**

"Daddy! Daddy! DADDY!"

Harley looked up from the magazine she was flipping through on the living room couch upon hearing Lucy yelling in her room, she sighed getting to her feet and tossing the magazine aside. She walked down the hall and into the room across from the master smiling as she found Lucy standing in her crib bouncing and calling for her daddy. At newly 3 years old most people would think the girl was too old for a crib but Harley had tried getting her to sleep in the toddler bed little by little so it was a 50/50 shot she'd sleep in it, so her parents let it slide figuring she'd sleep in the bed when she was ready. The girl with her bouncing blonde ringlets and bright steely blue eyes was every bit a daddy's girl when she knew he was home and most of the time he indulged her, taking her everywhere he went until nap or food times, but now that the child was awake from her morning nap and her father wasn't even awake yet meant the girl was going to stand in the crib yelling until Harley got her and explained that her father was sleeping.

Walking to the crib Harley lifted the girl holding her on her hip.

"Enough with the screaming please puddin' pie, daddy is sleeping."

Lucy looked at her mother with an angry pout her lower lip sticking out.

"Daddy!"

Harley sighed again but carried Lucy to the living room setting her down with her box of toys, everything from dolls and a real porcelain tea set to plastic knives and toy guns, before looking at the clock.

"You stay here and play Lucy, momma will go see if daddy is awake."

Lucy looked at her mother then nodded pulling out a plastic pistol messing with it. Harley went back down the hall to the master bedroom hoping Joker was awake already, he was not a fun person to wake up unless you're three years old with little blonde pigtails and called him daddy. Harley snorted realizing all except the being three years old she'd described herself, shaking her head she carefully opened the bedroom door and stepped inside looking around. The black out curtains kept the room fairly shadowed but the bits of light peeking around the edges lit the room enough to see, a large king sized bed dripping with royal purple and rich black silk dominated a part of the room, across from that a pair of wall in closets one for her and one for Joker, next to his closet door was the master bathroom and judging by the empty bed and the light spilling from the bathroom that's where Joker was.

Slipping over to the door she peeked in a smirk spreading over her lips as she found Joker just pulling on her favorite purple silk shirt. She carefully slipped into the room, of course he heard her feet padding on the floor but he played along letting her sneak up on him. Her arms wrapped around his waist making him chuckle as she giggled standing on tiptoe to rest her chin on his shoulder.

"Mornin' puddin'."

Her voice was a soft purr making him shudder slightly before turning around in her arms wrapping his around her waist pulling her close and kissing her.

"Mornin' kitten."

Harley smiled into the kiss returning it moving her arms to circle his neck as his hands moved over her back. The moment was broken when his phone made a sound making him pull away to check it before growling sending a message back. Harley watched disappointed and confused.

"Trouble puddin'?"

Joker smoothed his hair watching her in the mirror.

"The bat caused a stir in the business deals we made now I have to go and clean up the mess and knock a few heads."

Harley gave a smile at his words before following him out into the hall pausing as she heard Lucy in her room giggling wildly. Joker went to the hooks by the door where they kept a few of their go to coats including his famed purple alligator trench coat but as he looked over the coats he didn't see it though he was sure he'd hung it up there when he last used it. Giving a glow growl he started tearing the living room apart looking for it before finally moving to the hall.

"Harley! Where's my purple trench coat?!"

There was a giggle in response making him growl.

"Hold on puddin' I'll bring it to ya."

He crossed his arms growing slightly impatient until he heard Lucy giggling and stumbling out of her room. Looking down the hall he couldn't help but crack a smile at the sight of his three year old daughter toddling down the hall to him with his coat draped over her like a bed sheet trailing behind her.

"Daddy coat!"

He swooped down and lifted her up once she was close enough making her squeal a laugh as the coat slipped off her to pool at her father's feet as he held her over his head.

"Did you take my coat Lucy?"

The girl giggled again reaching down for him.

"Lucy take daddy coat!"

He laughed at her broken confession before bringing her down to his hip and kissing her cheek growling lightly so she laughed again.

"You cheeky little devil, little trickster, daddy's little fiend."

Lucy smiled cheekily at him resting her head on his shoulder as Harley joined them picking up the coat and brushing it off.

"She managed to get it off the hook and drug it all the way to her room thinking you'd come to her and find it."

Joker chuckled kissing his daughter's head.

"Clever little devil aren't you, takin' after your parents already."

Lucy smiled before reaching for Harley who took her handing Joker his coat earning a kiss as he pulled it on.

"I'll see my girls later tonight. You be good for your mother or else, understood?"

Lucy met his eyes holding his gaze, a task even the strongest man found impossible, before nodding breaking into a wide grin.

"Yes daddy!"

Joker nodded kissing her forehead then Harley's before leaving. Harley set Lucy down and followed as the girl walked to the living room but rather than go to her toys she went to the hooks of coats and looked up at them reaching up as high as her little body could stretch for Joker's spare gun holster making Harley quickly grab her seeing the ivory handled pistol still in it.

"Woah there baby girl, you know better than to touch that. How about you stick to stealing daddy's coat when he's here okay?"

Lucy thought about it for a moment then nodded smiling and sitting down with her toys pausing as she grabbed a toy car with a tutu on it and looked at Harley who sat on the couch picking up her magazine.

"Momma?"

Harley hummed her answer looking up at the girl to find her smiling.

"Lucy want daddy's coat."

Harley smiled at her daughter.

"You want a coat like daddy's?"

Lucy nodded excitedly making Harley's smile turn into a smirk looking down at the marked page of the magazine, a page with child sized coats and one just happened to match Joker's purple trench coat.

"Okay princess, whatever ya want."


	15. Chapter 15

**A/N: Hey babies! Sorry about the disappearance on this story but I've been working on my other stories that and life got in the way but now I'm back and as always taking ideas that you guys and gals wanna see! So PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE send in prompts and ideas for me? Don't forget to read and review! Thanks so much babies!**

 **Prompt: Joker teaches Harley to swim -Saber007**

 **Sink or Swim.**

"How much longer puddin'?"

Joker rolled his eyes as he led Harley by her shoulders through the old warehouse doors so she didn't run into them, since her eyes were covered by his tie, this was the twentieth time she'd asked how much longer in the past 10 minutes.

"Just a little longer baby, just don't peek."

Harley giggled again bouncing her next couple steps then stopping as Joker grabbed her hips to stop her.

"Don't move."

Harley nodded standing still goosebumps rising on her skin as his hands slid from her waist and she heard his footsteps fade then a small splash like someone stepped in water making her stomach drop and her smile falter while she tried to tell herself that he'd just stepped into a puddle that collected on the floor from leaking pipes or the dense air of the docs.

"Puddin'?"

Her voice wavered a little as she first reached her hands out in front of her then moved them up to her face when she didn't get an answer. Not hearing his normal growl of disapproval as she touched her makeshift blindfold she removed it letting her blue eyes flutter open slowly adjusting to the lighting. As soon as she could see clearly her stomach felt like a cold stone was weighing it down to her feet and her throat closed up making her heart start to race as she dropped the tie to the floor shaking her head.

A vast majority of the warehouse floor had been turned into a large pool that was about 3 feet deep at its shallowest and 12 feet at its deepest, Joker was standing on the lowest stair leading into the shallow water so that the liquid was up to his waist and a smile planted on his face as his arms outstretched for her.

"Surprise kitten, you're going to learn to swim and once that's done we can find other uses for this."

Harley tried to smile but it came out as a grimace making him raise an eyebrow and walk up a step close enough to grab her wrist.

"Come on, you'll never learn just standing there."

Harley couldn't feel her body as it began to shake tears filling her eyes as she let herself be moved to the very edge of the step before letting out an ear splitting scream.

"NOOOOOO!"

she yanked her hand free and ran back to the wall and crouched down holding her head tears rolling down her cheeks as she stared at him still standing on the pool stairs looking confused and slightly angry. Letting out a growl he walked over to her pulling her to her feet by her arms making her cry out again and weakly fight before hiding her face in his chest.

"D-don't make me swim Mr. J please."

Joker held her close for a moment before tilting her chin up to look into her eyes.

"Is this because of the car driving into the river?"

Harley shook her head wiping her eyes.

"N-no."

She let out a watery chuckle

"I couldn't give a damn about that, no I hate pools and all that thanks to a trauma as a kid."

She sniffled a little wiping her eyes as the memory came flooding back.

XxX~ 20 years before ~XxX

Harleen entered her house tears streaking down her cheeks, her glasses askew and her uniform dress all dirty, and her dark blonde hair falling out of its bun on her head, she set her bag down by the door and walked to the kitchen hearing her mother on the phone. As she entered the kitchen she found her mother standing at the counter taking on the phone looking through the phone.

"I just don't know what to do Alice, we've pulled her from every public school in the area and now even the private school isn't working out, Haylie didn't have these problems and she still doesn't."

She picked up an envelope that was a plum purple color her brows knitting together as she looked at who it was addressed to before setting it aside as she glanced over finally seeing Harleen standing there.

"Alice I have to go."

With that she hung up and moved over to kneel in front of the blonde child gently cupping her face wiping her tears.

"Harl what happened?"

Harleen sniffled as her mother fixed her glasses.

"They picked on my again, they called me four eyes and weirdo."

Her mother sighed kissing her cheek the stood up grabbing the purple envelope and holding it out to her giving a small smile.

"You got a letter sweetie."

Harleen took the letter and opened it taking out the invite card looking it over, for a child of six she could read remarkably well and while it made her parents happy it caused her to get picked on a lot. After reading the card she held it up for her mother to look at, the woman took it and looked it over smiling gently.

"Well how about that, Grace invited you to her birthday party! See Harleen I told you you'd make friends."

Harleen tried to smile but it was weak knowing this other girl completely hated her and teased her constantly but she wasn't about to shatter her mother's rosy notion of someone including her awkward daughter for a change and so that weekend Harleen was dropped off wearing a red tank top dress with white polka dots, white tights, black ballet flats, her hair braided and pinned up in a bun on her head, and holding a wrapped box with a card taped card to it. She was shown to the back yard by Grace's mother, who was very nice and called her sweetheart, and once in the yard she found the other girl's running around in swimsuits squealing as they ran through a sprinkler then jumped into the pool that took up most of the fenced in yard. Grace's mother placed a hand on Harleen's shoulder calling out to Grace making the brunette girl look up and scowl before plastering on a fake smile walking over.

"Harleen you made it."

The blonde nodded her fingers messing with her dress skirt to nervous to speak. Grace watched her mother walk away before dropping her smile and smirking evilly at Harleen as the three other girls came over flanking her.

"Where's your swimsuit four eyes? The card said it was a swimming party."

Harleen felt her face go red as she pushed her glasses up her nose.

"I-I didn't want to swim."

The other girls all looked at each other before wide smiles formed on their faces as they closed in on her.

"Aww come on Harleen take a little swim!"

With that the four girls teamed up and made quick work of pushing her into the deepest part of the pool laughing as they watched the blonde crash through the surface and sink like a rock bubbles dancing to the surface as she screamed then struggled. After about a moment Grace's mother looked up and noticed the children gathered by the pool side looking at the water and walked over then screamed upon seeing Harleen floating face down in the water. When Harleen woke up she was laying in a hospital bed and her mother was sitting beside her looking cross and upset.

"Momma?"

The woman jumped hearing her daughter's voice then gave a small smile taking her hand.

"Hi baby, how ya feeling?"

Harleen took a breath then coughed a little.

"Like I got sand in my lungs."

The woman's smile fell as she moved Harleen's hair from her forehead and placed a kiss there.

"It's going to feel like that for a little while baby, Grace said you fell in the pool at the party."

Harleen's brows knitted together as she shook her head.

"No momma, they pushed me in, Grace and the girls pushed me!"

The woman didn't move or say anything for a moment before kissing her head again.

"Okay baby. You get some more rest so you can feel all better."

Harleen tired to object but found herself tired and with a little fighting she fell back asleep.

XxX ~ Present ~XxX

Harley ran her hands over her face shuddering at the memory while Joker stares silently at her letting the story sink in before sighing and holding her close making her blink surprised.

"I won't let you drown, I don't care if I have to hold onto you the whole time, I won't let you get scared."

He placed a light kiss on her forehead making her smile closing her eyes and relaxing. After a moment she nodded taking a deep breath pulling away enough to look into his eyes.

"Alright, let's get it over with."

Joker chuckled taking her hand and leading her to the pool steps letting her take her time smiling as she eventually makes it into the pool up to her waist before wrapping her arms around his neck kissing him lightly.

"Thanks for being patient puddin'."

Joker chuckled securing her legs around his waist holding her close and kissing back distracting her as he moved her a little closer to the deeper water.

"Anything for my queen."


	16. Chapter 16

**A/N: Hey babies! As always PLEASE feel free to send in ideas and requests and I'd be happy to write them out! I hope you're all enjoying the stories thus far, speaking of stories this one is a mash up of two requests, one from a reader and my own so I hope you enjoy it!**

 **Prompt: Lucy gets sick -guest, Joker and Lucy have Daddy Daughter time -author choice**

 **Daddy Daughter Day.**

"Momma!"

Joker groaned as the word roused him from his sleep, which he'd just fallen into a few hours ago, before lifting his head and listening to see if the sound would occur again then when it didn't he settled back down letting his eyes close.

"Momma! Momma! Moooooomma!"

Joker growled sitting up and ran his hand over his face before looking at the bed beside him. It was empty just like he knew it would be, he hadn't told the yelling child down the hall but Harley was currently in Arkham working on her escape with Ivy, she'd gotten a message to him that she'd be home later that day. As far as the child knew Harley was just away visiting Ivy but evidentially whatever was causing the yelling had pushed that knowledge to the side.

"Momma!"

Joker sighed climbing out of bed and after pulling on a pair of sweatpants went to the room just down the hall and opened the door. Inside the walls were decorated with lilac colored wall paper that had little silver and gold crowns and swirls on it, the floor was covered in soft off white carpet, a large queen sized white four poster bed dripping with grass green bedding and stuffed animals dominated the middle of the room, off to one side there was a dresser with a mirror beside a closet, on the other side there was a small purple table and chairs with two large toy spotted hyenas with red and blue collars among other scattered toys and coloring books.

Laying in the bed among a mountain of toys and pillows was a little girl no more than 5 with blonde ringlets, steely blue eyes, and rosebud lips wearing a white nightgown her cheeks red and flushed as sweat clung to her brow. Joker moved into the room perching himself on the side of the red reaching out to brush her hair from her face.

"What's wrong princess? You know your momma is visiting Ivy."

The girl looked up at him with half lidded eyes as she took a breath through a stuffy nose letting out a small cough.

"I feel icky daddy."

Joker sighed lightly getting to his feet.

"Hold tight Lucy, daddy will be right back."

Lucy nodded watching him leave the room. Going to the master bathroom Joker found the bottle of cold medicine from when Harley was sick along with a thermometer before returning to Lucy's room sitting on the side of the bed again.

"Open your mouth princess."

Lucy obeyed opening her mouth allowing him to put the thermometer in under her tongue.

"Okay close and keep it there."

Again the girl obeyed closing her mouth along with her eyes, when the device beeped Joker thought she'd fallen back asleep until her eyes opened again watching as he took the thermometer out and looked at its reading.

"101.5, looks like you caught that nasty cold your momma had."

The girl's only response was a small coughing fit making Joker help her sit up and rub her back until she had her breath back.

"Don't like feelin' icky daddy."

Joker chuckled moving so he was laying on the bed holding her against his chest running his fingers through her curls.

"I know baby, it's no fun is it?"

Lucy shook her head nuzzling close to him and letting her eyes close for a moment then open again looking up at him.

"Story daddy, please?"

Joker gave a small smile gently stroking her cheek.

"Will it help my princess feel better?"

Lucy nodded giving a small yawn earning a chuckle and a kiss on the forehead.

"Okay princess."

Lucy smiled adjusting herself she her head was resting on his shoulder her body curled against his chest and torso while he thought of a story, unlike many little girls her age Lucy couldn't stand make believe stories about princesses in distress and kingdoms with brave knights heck as far as the girl was concerned she was a princess and her kingdom only had one knight, a dark knight that caused nothing but trouble for her parents the king and queen. Settling in against the pillows and pulling the blanket up over them Joker kissed her head.

"Has daddy told you the story of how he and momma met?"

Lucy shook her head looking up at him with eyes that mirrored his own just more innocent making him smile.

"A long time ago, before you were born, your momma was a doctor at a place called Arkham, the bad place where Batman takes the people he captures, and daddy was a little less high profile. Momma went by a different name back then the name Harleen Quinzel."

Lucy made a face at the name making Joker chuckle and lightly poke her her cheek.

"Now what's that face for?"

Lucy looked up at him.

"Don't like that name, borning."

Joker lightly tapped her nose.

"You hit the nail on the head kiddo, that name doesn't suit momma does it?"

Lucy shook her head smiling.

"Now where was I? Oh yes daddy was in Arkham because Batman put him there and Harleen was on her first day of being an intern doctor. One of the other doctors was walking her through the halls talking to her, daddy was sitting in his own little room whistling a show tune when momma walked by and stopped peering into the room. Daddy stopped whistling and gave her a smile that made her blush and smile back, she was whisked away by the other doctor. Well daddy wanted to show his thanks for making him smile so he had one of the guards let him out and he placed a red rose in her office then slipped away like he was never there."

Lucy smiled closing her eyes listening to the story snuggling closer to him as his hand rubbed her back but his eyes were focused on the wall staring but not seeing.

"When momma found the rose she brought it back to daddy's room and asked him how it got there, daddy told her he'd put it there, she said she should tell the mean guards he'd been out of his room but daddy caught her in the lie and then he told her that he liked her name, Harley Quinzel, because it could be made to sound like harlequin, a clown character. She'd told him she'd heard it before but she smiled all the same then began to walk away until daddy told her that it made him smile and made him feel like he had someone he could talk to."

Joker gave a small chuckle shaking his head still amazed by how easily he'd won the pretty little blonde over by tapping into her inner crazy side.

"After more visits from her daddy asked her for a favor, a gun, so he could get himself out of Arkham and repay Batman for putting him there. Momma wasn't sure but the next day she fulfilled the favor and brought the gun to daddy, he used it to escape and he took momma with him. She became his partner in crime and later on your mother."

He'd decided to modify the ending favoring to keep the harsher details hidden from the girl for now until she was old enough to understand. Looking down upon hearing a soft snore Joker found Lucy sound asleep against him earning a soft smile as he lightly kissed her forehead and holding her close.

"Sleep tight princess."

Letting his own eyes close as he rested his head against the headboard he slipped into his own slumber. A couple hours later Harley came home to a silent house making her chest tighten as she moved through the apartment looking for Joker or Lucy. Reaching Lucy's room she peeked in and smiled with a soft giggle finding Lucy and Joker curled up together in the girl's bed, she tiptoed into the room and tucked the blanket back over them before placing a soft kiss on each of their foreheads.

"My sweet, beautiful little angels."


	17. Chapter 17

**A/N: Hey babies! Thank you all for your reviews I enjoy seeing them! Also thank you to people who drop prompts! As always requests are always open so feel free to make one or a couple! Thanks to Saber007 for the prompt in this story and all her help with this and my other stories!**

 **Prompt: A 'normal' Sunday afternoon. -Saber007**

 **Sunday afternoon.**

Harley woke to the feeling of warm sunlight on her skin making her smile and stretch before letting her eyes flutter open. The room around her was painted a soft white that looked pearlescent with the morning sun shining in from the window through the white lace curtains, she closed her eyes again and rolled onto her side her smile widening as she was met with a light peck on the lips making her giggle.

"Morning Leeny."

Harley opened her eyes sighing lovingly as she reached her hand out and lightly stroked the cheek of the man lying beside her. His dark brown hair was tousled from sleep, his steel blue eyes were shining with adoration and a touch of sleep. He turned his head to kiss her palm letting his own eyes close as he gently gripped her wrist making her giggle again.

"Stop it Joe, it tickles."

He smirked against her skin moving his lips to her wrist sliding his hands up her arms and down to her hips before pulling her close making her giggle again resting her forehead against his placing her hands on his shoulders letting her eyes close again as he kissed her lips lightly. Suddenly the peaceful silence in the room was broken by the sound of little feet followed by the door being thrown open and a small voice squealing as the bed jolted.

"Wake up! Momma daddy wake up!"

Harley chuckled opening her eyes and rolling onto her back opening her arms for the little blonde girl standing at the foot of the bed. The girl smiled wide her steel blue eyes glimmering happily as she sprung herself into her mother's arms snuggling close making Harley chuckle and kiss her forehead and each cheek.

"What a wake up call, what are you doing up so early Lucy?"

Lucy looked up at her biting her lip as she glanced at her father, who was helping a little boy no more than 3 with dirty blonde curls onto the bed, then back up at her mother.

"I want daddy to help me ride my bike today."

Harley smiled kissing her head and tucking a strand of hair behind her ear.

"Well then you better ask daddy nicely if he'll help you."

Lucy smiled and nodded sitting up and moving to sit on her father's stomach while her little brother moved aside to greet his mother. Joe chuckled as his daughter pinned him down, he couldn't help but smile when she gave him the look she currently was, wide blue eyes behind fluttering eyelashes, pouty lower lip and her little hands linked under her chin.

"Daddy?"

He smiled shaking his head with a chuckle already won over.

"Yes princess?"

Lucy smiled biting her lip.

"Will you help me ride my big girl bike? Please?"

Joe chuckled leaning up and kissing her cheek and tickling her earring a shriek and a laugh.

"Anything my princess wants, but first how about breakfast?"

Lucy managed to stop laughing and nod wrapping her arms around his neck as he slipped out of bed holding her. He paused looking back at Harley who was walking around the bed holding their son smiling as he jabbered to her in broken sentences that only she seemed to completely understand. Once they were close enough he wrapped his free arm around her shoulders and kissed her head.

"Why don't you and JJ get ready and Lucy and I will make breakfast?"

Harley turned her attention to her husband with a small smirk.

"Oh no you don't Joe, last time you made breakfast you burnt it and nearly took the house with it. No you and Lucy get ready while JJ and I make breakfast."

Lucy giggled remembering the weekend before when her father had tried to make breakfast for everyone but what were supposed to be pancakes ended up being black hockey pucks. Joe flushed a little at the reminder but smiled stealing a kiss from her in defeat.

"Alright you win, be down in 10."

Harley beamed kissing back before carrying JJ on her hip down stairs to the kitchen. The kitchen wasn't anything overly fancy, stainless steel appliances, black granite countertops, farm sink, a bay window that looked into the back yard and a large open arched doorway that led into a living area. She placed JJ in his high chair gently kissing his head before beginning breakfast humming to herself as she did.

"Momma!"

She looked over her shoulder at JJ and smiled carrying over a small bowl of cut up fruit setting it on the tray in front of him.

"What is it sweetie bug?"

JJ smiled at the food set before him then up at her.

"I ride too!"

She smiled kissing his head.

"Momma will help you ride your bike later when sissy rides hers okay?"

JJ nodded and started eating happily appeased while she went back to making breakfast. A few minutes later Joe came into the kitchen, now wearing a plain dark grey shirt, jeans and his hair had been tamed and slicked back, followed by Lucy who was now wearing a mint green coveralls skirt, a lilac t-shirt, a pair of lilac knee high socks and her favorite black flats with pink bows on the toe. Harley smiled setting a plate at the counter for each of them chuckling when they swapped plates so Lucy had scrambled eggs and Joe had over easy.

Once she was done eating Harley cleaned up JJ and the dishes before taking the boy upstairs while the father daughter pair headed outside. After dressing JJ in a dark green shirt and denim overalls with brown shoes she changed into a simple navy flannel button down, a pair of blue jeans caprese, tied her dirty blonde hair up in a bun on the back of her head and put on her glasses not feeling like bothering with her contacts. After they were both dressed she took the boy back down stairs and out into the back yard where she set him down wagging as he hurried over to where Lucy was standing waiting for her father to get the training wheels off her bike.

After removing the training wheels and moving the bike out to the front sidewalk Harley watched as Lucy shakily got on the bike while Joe held it steady for her softly encouraging her. Lucy looked at her father with pleading blue eyes.

"Don't let go till I say so?"

Joe smiled encouragingly and nodded.

"I'm right here princess, you can do it."

Lucy nodded glancing back at her mother and little brother, who was trying to get started on pedaling his big wheel without help and struggling a bit. Harley clapped excitedly smiling bright.

"You got this baby girl! Momma knows you can do it!"

A smile crossed Lucy's lips and she gave her father the okay that she was ready. She started pedaling moving down the sidewalk with her father's help at first until she realized he'd let go and she was riding on her own. A wide smile crossed her face as she brought the bike to a stop in front of the neighbor's driveway and turned around then riding back stopping in front of her parents who were both wearing happy and proud smiles. She got off her bike smiling hugely.

"I did it! Did ya see?! I rode all by myself!"

Harley smiled scooping her daughter up in a hug.

"Yes you did momma's big girl! I'm so proud of you!"

Lucy giggled hugging her back then looking at JJ who was in their father's arms clapping.

"Yay sissy!"

Harley chuckled kissing Lucy's cheek again before looking over her shoulder hearing footsteps.

"So what are we celebrating?"

Harley's smile widened seeing Floyd Lawton standing behind them on the sidewalk and his daughter Zoe in front of him on her bike.

"Lucy just rode her bike without training wheels for the first time, didn't you baby?"

Lucy nodded and wiggled out of her mother's hold going over to Zoe and hugging the girl quickly launching into telling the story. Joe handed JJ over to Harley before greeting Floyd with a handshake then watching as the girl's abandoned their bikes and ran to the back yard making Joe chuckle gesturing in the direction.

"Might as well stick around, looks like the girl's aren't giving you a choice."

Floyd smiled and nodded.

"Guess your right, so much for the trip to the park."

Harley smiled from her place a few paces ahead of the men.

"Why don't you two just stay for lunch, it's been awhile since the kids had a play date."

Floyd looked at where Lucy and Zoe were playing on the swing set and nodded.

"Alright, ya convinced me, we'll hang around."

Harley smiled brightly and set JJ on his feet to join the girl's before disappearing inside to start lunch while the guys kept an eye on the kids talking about this and that, but mostly from what she could hear through the window was about the football game from Friday night making her shake her head but smile. For the rest of the afternoon Harley sat with Joe and Floyd and watched the kids play while they talked, Floyd asked her how her work as a child psychologist was going and she asked how his gun store was doing, normal talk until sunset when he decided it was time to head back home.

Once good-byes were said Joe and Harley took Lucy and JJ inside and after dinner got them ready for bed. Harley was sitting in JJ's room gently humming a lullaby as the boy slowly fell asleep on her shoulder until he was completely out letting her lay him in his toddler bed. She leaned down and placed a soft hiss to his forehead.

"Night little man, momma loves you."

Seeing him smile in his sleep she quietly left the room and went to Lucy's doorway leaning on it as she found Joe sitting on the edge of the bed reading from a story book while Lucy drifted in and out of sleep holding a toy rabbit close. As the story ended Joe closed the book and set it aside before kissing Lucy's head earning a sleepy smile.

"Good night princess."

Lucy gave a small yawn.

"Night daddy, love you."

Joe smiled brushing her hair from her cheek.

"I love you more, now go to sleep princess."

Lucy gave another yawn but fell asleep a small smile on her lips. Joe smiled walking to the doorway and his smile widened a bit finding Harley waiting. He placed his hands on her hips and lightly kissed her neck earning a soft hum in response before she giggled and moved from his hold keeping her hand in his waiting for him to follow which he did after a moment gently closing Lucy's door behind him. Harley led him into their bedroom letting out a giggle as he caught her in his arms from behind pinning her arms over her stomach and kissed her jaw until she relaxed in his hold before he smirked and tickled her side and lower back earning a small squeal as she tried to pull out of his hold laughing with him as he let her move arms length away.

Harley smiled at him wrapping her arms around his neck as she moved back to press against him resting her forehead on his as he leaned down to steal a light kiss his arms wrapping around her waist holding her close. She smiled into the kiss letting out a happy sigh as she closed her eyes.

"I love you Joe."

Joe smiled kissing her temple before his arms slipped under her backside and lifted her up so her legs were around his waist making her giggle and lightly grip his shoulders to steady herself as he walked to the foot of the bed.

"I love you more Harleen."

Harley felt her heart flutter at the use of her full first name as he gently laid her on the bed and hovered over her.

"I love you most."

Before he could respond she kissed him pulling him onto the bed with her then snuggling up close to him as he laid beside her gently stroking her hair. Harley let her eyes close sighing contently under his light touch her whole body relaxing as he kissed her forehead.

"Sleep angel, I'm not going anywhere."

Harley smiled snuggling closer curling her arms against his chest and tucking her head under his chin as he pulled the blankets over them then gently ran his fingers through her hair as she fell asleep. Harley was woken from her sleep by the feel of the bed shifting making her eyes open, confusion fogged her mind not by the movement that woke her but by her surroundings from the wine red silk sheets and pillow case under her, the soft black blanket covering her bare body from the waist down to the darkness in the room. She looked around and found she wasn't in the little suburban house but rather the penthouse apartment she called her castle, the movement that had woken her was Joker getting out of bed and making his way across the room to the bathroom with his phone in hand looking at the screen.

Taking in the room again she let out a heavy sigh and rested her head back on the pillow trying to ignore the heavy heart in her chest and go back to sleep. She closed her eyes trying to conjure up the dream again but just as she was toeing the line of awake and asleep a sound pulled her back making her huff and open her eyes as she lifted her head looking for the source finding it to be Joker sitting at the desk wearing only his Arkham sweat pants in the corner by her vanity table with the little lamp on and a pencil scratching across paper. After a few minutes of quietly watching she let her eyes drift to the clock on the night stand and blinked a few times seeing it was 2am. Running her eye as a small yawn escaped her lips she slipped out of bed and tiptoed across the room to where Joker was sitting and peeked over his shoulder seeing he was writing out some kind of plan, she debated between leaving him be and going back to sleep or interrupting his work and risking a strike across the cheek.

Deciding to take the risk she lightly rested her hands on his shoulders gently rubbing them and leaning close to his ear so her breath tickled his jaw.

"Come back to bed Puddin'."

Joker gave a low growl shrugging her hands away and continuing his work.

"Go away Harley, I'm busy and if you make me forget this plan so help me you'll pay."

Harley felt her anger rise and her heart sink as she pulled away from him and going back to the bed sitting down hugging a pillow close as she watched him for a few minutes. As her eyes started getting harder and harder to keep open she laid back down and curled up under the blanket holding the pillow close letting her eyes close as she slowly drifted closer to sleep. Once again as she was toeing the line of asleep and awake the bed moved but didn't pull her away from the shimmering fog of her dreams. She felt arms wrap around her and pull her close and lips press against her forehead and knew they were real but the words that followed she wasn't sure were real or her dream as she finally slipped into deep sleep the words just a soft echo in the darkness.

"I love you Harley."


	18. Bonus Chapter

**PLEASE READ! A/N: Hey babies! Soo seeing as requested chapters are taking a little longer than planned among other chapters for other stories I decided to give you guys a bonus chapter! This one came to me late in the night while I was listening to a YouTube playlist of old songs I loved and I came across an old Kenny Chesney song called 'There Goes my Life' and as I was watching the video for it I couldn't help but see that the graney video of a young man with dark hair and eyes reminded me of Jared without all his Joker make up and my mind started playing ideas and I just loved this one based off the second part of the song. If you haven't heard the song I suggest giving it a listen too while you read or not you're call. Now enough rambling let's get on with it yeah?**

 **Bonus chapter: My Everything.**

Joker sat in the VIP booth of the club his eyes trailing through the crowd of people below drinking, dancing, and gambling away their paychecks while girls danced on scattered stages the main stage, Harley's cage, was empty tonight his queen other wise occupied leading to his wandering attention span and the cause for the man slouched dead and bleeding from a bullet wound between the eyes across a glass coffee table from the clown prince. He let his eyes close and his head loll back onto the back of the white sofa as he let out a heavy sigh. With the music of the club pounding behind glass panes the sound of footsteps coming down the stairs into the office escaped Joker's notice so when he felt light tugs on his pant legs his eyes flew open and a snarl escaped his lips as he aimed the gun at the floor where the attacker would be but his response was a fit of giggles as a pair of chubby little hands reached up for him, bright steely blue eyes gleamed behind loose blonde curls.

"Daddy!"

Joker let out a low growl but put his gun aside and lifted the toddler into his lap watching as she smiled a gappy toothish grin before putting her hands on his chest and standing on his lap so she could meet his eyes.

"Aren't you supposed to be in bed little monster? That's why your mother was upstairs."

The girl didn't let her smile fall as she listened to his words.

"I say night-night daddy."

Joker let a small chuckle escape his lips as he wrapped the toddler in his arms placing a kiss to her cheek with a purr making her laugh.

"Daddy tickles!"

Joker gave a small laugh before standing with her still in his arms walking to the foot of the stairs pausing to grab an abandoned teddy bear dressed in a little maroon tux then handing it to the toddler in his arms.

"Alright daddy's little junior monster, your momma's waiting for you upstairs so she can tuck you in so up you go."

The girl looked at him as he set her lightly on her little feet on the bottom step. She smiled again bringing her little hand to her lips and kissing the palm before pulling it away blowing a kiss to him as she giggled.

"Love you daddy."

Joker smiled and pretended to catch the kiss before watching her climb the stairs and disappearing into the penthouse. Once she was gone he moved back to his seat on the sofa turning his back to the crowd but it was all just background noise and colored blurs as thoughts of the past two years went through his head. In two years he's whole world had been turned upside down by the little toddler with big blue eyes, blonde bouncing curls and an infectious laugh, in two years his world had expanded to include someone besides himself and Harley and as much as he hated to admit it he was wrapped around the child's little finger all it took was batting those carbon copies of his own blue eyes, a pouty lower lip and her little bell like voice saying 'daddy' to make him cave.

When Harley had first told him she was pregnant no more than a few months after he'd sprung her from Belle Reve he didn't know what to think, his crazed mind was scrambled at the idea of a child being born to him and Harley and he didn't know weather to be furious that they'd let it happen or, like Harley, happy. She'd managed to keep him from a rage and confusion induced melt down by reasoning with him that one day they'd need an heir to ensure business carried on and someone to leave a legacy for so they could carry on the Joker name. He wasn't fully convinced with the idea but it kept him sane through Harley's pregnancy.

When Lucy had been born and he'd held her for the first time is when he knew without any doubt that despite his best efforts he was fascinated by the tiny creature wrapped in a yellow blanket looking at him with clear steel blue eyes, he knew from then on he loved her and above all else that now it wasn't just Harley that was his reason for existing so was this tiny life, the pair of them were his life, his everything because without a queen there is no kingdom and without a heir the kingdom has no future.

The sound of feet once again evaded him but this time when hands lightly rubbed his shoulders he didn't react knowing the only one brave enough, the only one allowed, to lay a hand on him besides his toddler daughter was Harley and he knew the scent of her bubble gum hand lotion anywhere weather he was focused on the real world or lost in his head. Harley leaned close to his ear so her chin was resting on his shoulder bringing his mind back to the present but he didn't move waiting to see what she'd do.

"What's buzzin' around in your head Puddin'?"

He didn't answer her as he turned his head to meet her eyes before letting out a sigh leading her around the sofa then into his lap where he wrapped his arms around her waist and placed his forehead to her's staring into her baby blues.

"These two little blonde beauties I know."

He could see jealous anger rising in the back of her eyes making him smirk and peck her lips.

"A mother and daughter pair."

Her muscles tensed and her nails dug into his shoulders.

"My queen and my princess, my candles in the dark, my everything in life."

Harley's body relaxed and melted into his as he kissed her again this time she made it longer by wrapping her arms around his neck. Once the kiss broke she kept her eyes on his and a soft smile on her lipstick smudged lips, he chuckled using his thumb to wipe away the smudges making her giggle but let him, yes this woman and the little girl upstairs asleep were everything he'd said and more, much more, than what he could name.


	19. Chapter 19

**A/N: Hey babies! Thanks to everyone for reviewing and to those who drop prompts I hope you'll continue to do so because as always requests are open! A special thanks to Dana (guest) for requesting this prompt I hope you enjoy!**

 **Prompt: Lucy introduces her boyfriend to her parents. -Dana**

 **Meet the parents.**

Joker stood in his and Harley's bedroom checking his appearance in the mirror hanging on the wall beside Harley's closet making sure he looked perfect, if the blonde was in the room she'd say he was being over the top but she was currently in the kitchen making dinner and judging by the giggles and singing coming from down the hall Lucy was helping her. He shook his head at their singing and giggle fits before leaning close to the mirror smoothing back his hair starting to straighten up but stopping as his eyes locked on a particular spot on his scalp.

Harley sang along to the song playing from Lucy's phone playlist as she decorated the evening's dessert, a large chocolate cake, while Lucy set the table. Setting the piping bag down Harley pressed the pause button on the phone and looked at her daughter a small smile crossing her lips. At 16 Lucy looked every bit like Harley, long blonde hair with pale green tips, soft creamy skin dotted with a tattooed band of green and lilac harlequin diamonds around her right bicep courtesy of her father, and full lips currently painted pale pink with tinted lip gloss. She definitely got her mother's looks but as she turned back to check Harley's approval of the table set up the eyes that looked at her were carbon copies of Joker's steely blue pools.

"Looks great puddin' pie, though are you sure you want the poor kid within arms reach of your father?"

Lucy looked back at the set up and bit her lip before shrugging walking to her mother's side swiping the piping bag and squeezing a dot of the dark chocolate frosting onto her finger licking it off.

"I'll just sit between them."

She giggled as Harley smiled and lightly swatted her butt taking the bag back.

"Honestly Lucy, just as bad as your father, no sweets until after dinner."

Lucy rolled her eyes but smiled.

"That's you momma."

Harley smirked tapping her nose.

"Oh yeah, regardless I'm not havin' you ruin your dinner tonight when I made your favorite."

Lucy rolled her eyes smiling as she moved to the speaker where her phone was plugged in and unplugged it quickly texting their guest for the evening before walking back to the living room and laying on the sofa. Harley watched her then began lightly singing the song that had been playing under her breath as she checked dinner straightening up as she heard Joker's footsteps coming down the hall.

"Took ya long enough puddin', dinner will be done as soon as Lucy's guest arrives."

Joker growled at her making her put her hands on her hips.

"Really Mr. J? Quit being such a sour puss, he's just her boyfriend it ain't like she's bringing him home to say they ran off ta vegas or something and got married."

Lucy laughed from the living room making Harley smile until she looked at Joker and raised an eyebrow her smile fading seeing his emotions flutter across his face starting with annoyance which she guest was at her bad joke then something she couldn't quite put her finger on. She moved her hands from her hips to his shoulders drawing his eyes to her own.

"What's wrong Puddin'?"

Joker grabbed her hands removing them before stepping back arms length from her.

"Harley do you see anything different? Anything out of place?"

Harley looked him over raising an eyebrow, sure he was always a stickler for perfection when it came to his looks but this was different. She knew as well as he did they weren't exactly spring chickens anymore with Lucy being 16 but the chemicals had changed them both and all but halted any effects of aging, there were small changes that anyone that wasn't looking would miss like the fact Harley had developed little lines around her eyes and Joker had gotten the same lines and slight laugh lines that were almost impossible to see.

"I don't see nothin' wrong Puddin', ya look stunning as always."

Joker gave a low growl squeezing her hands.

"Look harder Harl."

Rolling her eyes she looked him over again but this time she seen it, in his neon green hair there was a small line that had paled and was less vibrant. A smile crept onto her lips as she took her hands back and cupped his cheek with one while the other went to his hair examining the strand.

"Is this what you're all worked up over? A little change in your hair?"

Joker met her eyes.

"My hair is going Harl, how can I not be worked up over it?!"

Harley rolled her eyes taking her hands back and moving to take the parmesan and herb chicken from the oven.

"Honestly Mr. J ya can't even see it! Even if ya could who cares we ain't exactly in the prime of our lives anymore, hell I'll be 43 in a few months be thankful those dips into the chemicals kept us from turning into a couple of prunes before we were old enough to be old prunes."

Joker growled at her watching as she set the baking dish on the stove.

"How can you be taking this so smoothly? Aren't women even more picky about their vanity?"

Harley rolled her eyes tossing her hair over her shoulder showing off that her own hair had a small collection of strands that was duller than the rest of her platinum locks.

"Because Puddin' I'm 42 and I have the body and ability of a 26 year old, I don't need to worry about vanity, and neither should you."

Joker was only able to stare at her for a long moment before letting out a huff and slinking from the room and sitting on the end of the couch by Lucy's feet mumbling something to her about it being her fault making her roll her eyes but smile as she got up kissing his cheek.

"He'll be here in 5."

Harley nodded putting the last touches on the chicken as she placed it on the table along with mixed veggies, rolls and roasted potatoes.

"Are you gonna go meet him down in the club or let Frosty bring him up?"

Lucy smiled at the mention of her father's right hand man who'd she'd grown to see as part of the family despite the fact he secretly had one of his own.

"I'll bring him up, don't want him having a panic attack being given the run down by Frosty."

Both girls smiled at each other knowing Joker had given the head henchmen instructions to give any boy that walked through the doors for Lucy a run down of rules and consequences that normally had them running out the door. Lucy looked at her phone as it chimed her smile widening as she checked it then tucked it into her pocket.

"He's here! I'll go get him!"

She moved to the door but paused looking back at her father with begging eyes.

"And daddy please try not to scare this one I really like him."

Joker looked at her and sighed giving a small nod earning a bright smile before she vanished down to the club. Harley walked over to the back of the sofa and placed her hands on his shoulders rubbing them making his muscles relax a fraction.

"Come on Puddin' stop sulking, if ya want when this is over I'll help ya dye your hair so ya can't see the change okay? And as for meeting this boy don't be too rough, he already knows who you are and is still willing to meet you that's guts."

Joker placed a hand over her's leaning his head back into her stomach.

"Or stupidity, besides if he ever hurt our princess I'd think you'd be just as dangerous as I would."

Harley smiled leaning down and kissing his forehead before coaxing him to stand.

"Come on, let's get this over with yeah?"

Joker let out a heavy breath before nodding and standing at her side his arm around her waist holding her to his side as the sound of footsteps reached the door. When it opened Lucy let the boy walk in first letting her parents get a look at him, he was a decent looking kid with neatly messy black hair, green eyes, a little short but still taller than Lucy and athletically lean. He was wearing a crisp white dress shirt tucked into his black dress pants, a dark grey suit jacket and black polished shoes. Lucy smiled looping her arm through his and walking him over to stand before her parents.

"Momma, Daddy, this is Damian. Damian these are my parents."

Damian looked first at Harley and offered a kind smile as he gently took her hand she offered and lightly kissed her knuckles.

"Mrs. Quinn it's a pleasure to meet you."

Harley smiled taking her hand back.

"Charmer."

Her tone was playful as she smiled and winked at Lucy before watching as the two males sized each other up before Damian nodded his head in greeting, a smart move by the kid Harley had to admit normally people offered the king of crime a handshake upon meeting if they weren't pissing themselves and they'd get growled at and told to sod off.

"Mr. J."

Now Joker raised a brow at the boy, he'd been expecting a sir or something along those lines that he often detested but the kid simply called him the other preferred name apart from Joker. Lucy bit her lip watching her father as he kept his face unreadable before letting out a chuckle and a small smile.

"Smart kid."

The air in the room relaxed a deal making Harley smile and clapped her hands.

"Now that introductions are done let's eat yeah?"

Lucy nodded leading Damian to the table with Joker and Harley a few steps behind. Once at the table Damian pulled out first Harley's chair then pushed it in for her once she was sat then did the same for Lucy making both women smile and Lucy blush. Harley looked at Joker expecting some form of anger or jealousy from him but to her surprise he had a slight smirk on his lips and an approving look in his eye as he watched the young pair. Dinner was filled with small talk and questions for Damian, as Harley finished serving dessert she asked a question that made the whole air of the room change.

"So Damian what do your parents do for a living?"

Damian seemed to struggle swallowing his bite of cake before setting his fork down keeping his eye on the table.

"My father owns a very well known and successful business and I haven't seen my mother for about 7 years now."

Harley winced at the answer looking for a way to switch off the topic but Joker gave a light chuckle looking at Damian as the boy raised his green eyes to meet Joker's.

"What company does your old man own? Maybe we've crossed paths before."

Damian kept his eyes on Joker's making the green haired man feel a little bit impressed by the feat.

"Wayne Enterprises."

Joker let out a laugh drawing Harley's eye to him and found him smiling at her.

"Ahh yes, Brucey boy! We've crashed quite a few charity auctions and building openings of his before, didn't know he had a son though."

Lucy gave Joker a look but Damian just patted her hand with a small smile before looking at Joker.

"My mother and grandfather raised me far away from here until I was 11 then when she died I got sent here to a father that didn't even know I existed, on the same note no one knew the infamous Clown Couple of Gotham had a daughter until she was 7."

Both girls tensed eyes watching Joker as he was quiet for a long moment before he chuckled crossing his arms and leaning back in his chair.

"Touché kid."

The tension released from the air as Harley and Lucy smiled the former leaning over and placing a kiss on Joker's cheek as she took the dishes to the kitchen. The next couple hours passed easier in the family room with Lucy sitting tucked under Damian's arm while Harley sat on the floor against Joker's legs smirking and laughing as she told stories about Lucy when she was little, the sun was just starting to set outside making Damian look at Lucy and gently brush a strand of hair from her face as she looked up at him.

"It's getting late and I should get home."

Lucy gave a small pout but got to her feet as he did.

"I'll walk you back down."

Joker nudged Harley with his foot making her get to her feet as he did but watched as he walked over to the young couple placing a heavy hand on Damian's shoulder gaining the boy's attention from the window where against the darkening sky the bat-signal was glowing but Joker didn't meet his eyes as he looked at Lucy.

"I'll walk him out princess, you go and help your mother with finishing dishes."

Lucy's brow creased in worry and she opened her mouth to object but Harley quickly put her hands on her shoulders and steered her to the kitchen leaning close to her ear.

"Easy Puddin' pie, daddy ain't going to hurt him if he was going to then the poor boy would be half dead already, he just wants a word with him man to man."

Lucy met her eyes her own steely blue ones wide and worried.

"But momma what if-"

"What if your father scares him and he never comes back?"

Lucy nodded biting her lip making Harley give a small smile and kissing her forehead.

"It'll be okay Lucy, the kid made it all through tonight without so much as a flinch at your father I think you found a keeper sweetie."

Lucy gave a small giggle as Harley playfully pinched her cheek then led her to the sink where they finished the dishes. Joker walked Damian back down to the club but stopped him by putting a hand on his shoulder standing in the middle of the empty club.

"Alright little bird what's the angle here? You get in with my princess to find this location then you run back to Bat-brain so he can come here and cause all kinds of hell?"

Damian kept his shock off his face as he shook his head.

"No, you've got it wrong Joker."

Joker gave a wide smile circling Damian chuckling in a taunting way.

"Is that so? Then what exactly was the point of this 'meeting the parents' deal hmm?"

Damian clenched his jaw but kept his cool.

"It was exactly that clown, believe what you want but I actually care for Lucy I'd never use her and toss her away even if it meant an end to you and everything you've done."

Joker stood in front of him meeting his green eyes and holding them for a long moment before grabbing Damian by the collar.

"You better stick to that word of yours like a tick on a dog kid otherwise you're gonna end up like the last Robin that cross me, you hurt my princess and you'll be dead before Batman even has a clue where to look for you, am I clear?!"

Damian pulls himself free and walked to the door making Joker let out a heavy breath and smooth his hair preparing for the fit of tears and most likely a tantrum he was going to have to face from Lucy, he was just about to climb the stairs back to the penthouse but stopped as Damian looked at him over his shoulder and spoke.

"I'm not going to hurt her."

Joker smirked listening to the heavy metal doors close as Damian left before he climbed the stairs rolling his eyes as he seen Lucy looking nervous as she bounced on the balls of her feet. He held up his hands in a surrender motion.

"I think he got the message loud and clear-"

"Daddy you didn't!"

Joker looked at her with a low growl.

"Let me finish talking princess before you make assumptions. I was going to say I think he got the message loins and clear because he promised me he wasn't going to hurt you."

Lucy stopped bouncing and smiled brightly as she rushed forward and hugged her father kissing his cheek.

"Thank you daddy!"

Joker rolled his eyes but held her close kissing her head.

"Anything to make my princess happy."

Lucy smiled and kissed his cheek again before pulling away rubbing her eye as she walked to Harley and kissed her cheek.

"I think I'm going to turn in early, I was up at dawn and it feels like I haven't slept for a week."

Harley giggled kissing her temple mumbling something to her that made Lucy give her a thankful look before disappearing to her room. Later that night Harley was laying with Joker in their statism covered bed with her arm on his chest supporting her chin while her other hand gently played with his head.

"I can still dye it if ya want puddin'."

Joker opened his eyes looking into her own baby blue pools before giving a small smile leaning forward and kissing her gently earning a purr and a smile as she kissed back.

"I think I'll leave it, you can't even see it."

Harley smiled stealing another quick kiss before moving her arm and letting her head rest against his chest as her eyes closed for a moment then opened again.

"Puddin'?"

Joker sighed but didn't open his eyes.

"Shhh Harl, time to sleep."

Harley gave a small huff pushing herself up on her elbows to look at his face.

"But puddin'."

Joker placed a finger to her lips cracking one eye open.

"Sleep Harley."

Harley rolled her eyes pushing his finger away.

"I just wanted to say thank you for being so civil with that boy today, it meant a lot to Lucy."

Joker closed his eye and wrapped his arm around her pulling her back down earning a small giggle as she moved to get comfortable.

"Like I told her, anything for my princess, now go to sleep Harley before I punish you."

Harley gave another giggle liaising his bare chest.

"What kind of punishment?"

Joker didn't answer for a moment before rubbing her back.

"The kind of punishment where you go sleep in the guest room or I go sleep in my office."

Harley gasped but he could hear her smile as she nuzzled closer tucking her head under his chin and curling her hands up on his chest slowly drifting off to sleep Joker just minutes behind holding her close.


	20. Chapter 20

**Prompt (s): Harley nearly drowns and Joker saves her. -Becca3012**

 **Batman hurts Harley and Joker gets pissed. -JWolf28**

 **His Water baby.**

Harley looked around at the shadows that engulfed the docks as midnight fell over Gotham, she let out a bored sigh and watched her breath escape into the sky as a wispy white cloud, it was early spring and the nights were still bitter cold yet here she stood on the docks with four or five of Joker's goons wearing a pair of black jeans, one of Joker's wine red silk dress shirts, her heaviest leather jacket which happened to be custom made half black half maroon red with a diamond on the back and multiple pins of all kinds on the front, and a pair of red plaid rabbit fur lined boots. Her old fall back of red and black was her favorite outfit collaboration but it really didn't suit her now-a-days with all her tattoos, pale skin, bleached blonde hair and of course her beloved cotton candy tips but she didn't care at the moment her current outfit was the warmest she had that wasn't completely out of style or would make her stand out like a neon sign.

A sound to her left pulled her out of her thoughts and made her scan the shadows again eyes carefully looking for movement, after a second the sound came again followed by the figure of a little mouse scratching against a crate making her relax a little but just to be sure she turned to one of the goons assigned to look out, and babysitter.

"Terrie go check out that corner."

The man looked at her but didn't move making her growl, out of all the goons on Joker's payroll there were only a handful that actually listened to her commands when the boss wasn't around. She stepped up to him leering up into his black eyes ignoring the fact he was a good foot taller than her, size isn't everything in a real fight not when you play dirty.

"Are you deaf dumbass or do I need to tell Mr. J you ain't takin' orders no more?!"

Terrie rolled his eyes at her but shoved by her and went to investigate the shadows behind the crate making her smirk and cross her arms watching. As the man reached the crate something didn't feel right in the air causing her to grab her gun hidden in her jacket and take aim, the other goons saw her movement and copied. As if on cue Terrie started shooting at something they couldn't see but was quickly taken out, seconds later the familiar figure of Batman appeared atop the crate making Harley curse under her breath and start shooting. It took enough time to empty a full clip on her gun before Harley snarled and looked at the goons still firing at Batman who wasn't able to get close just yet thanks to the barrage.

She quickly let out a high pitched whistle that managed to ring out over the fire fight and within seconds a whole swarm of new goons came rushing out of a shipping crate and trailing behind them with his famous hyena grin was Joker. Harley quickly made her way through the crowd of goons to his side smiling when he pulled her to his side and away from the gunfire before looking at Batman who was currently forced to hide behind the crate until the goons ran out of ammo. Harley watched carefully before her smile fell and she pushed Joker to the side just in time for a wayward bullet to miss his head, a bullet that had been skillfully reflected by a batarang. Joker leered at her ready to yell at her but stopped seeing the indent of the bullet in the wall and instead patted her cheek.

"Good girl. But you ever do that to daddy again and he'll break your arm."

Harley nodded mutely making him nod once before looking back at the fight as the goons started running low on ammo. Harley bit her lip shifting her weight from foot to foot waiting for the command to jump into the fight or make a mad dash for the escape van, seeing this Joker smirked leaning close to her ear whispering three words that made her smile wickedly.

"Make daddy proud."

With those words she ran into the mix of goons grabbing the first thing she could use as a weapon, a crowbar, and charged at Batman just as he was leaving his cover. Though surprised at her attack Batman managed to block it or move out of the way each time she swung at him until she'd backed him into a corner making her smile maniacally and swing the bar again only to have him duck under it and the bar to embed itself in the shipping crate making her snarl as she tried to pull it out. She was just starting to get it free on the second tug when she was suddenly kicked hard in the gut and sent skidding back against the dock coming to a stop on the extreme edge hanging above the water.

Getting to her feet she held her stomach eyes searching for the geriatric bat only to find him and Joker locked in a fist fight making her growl then scream as the water rotted dock edge gave way under her sending her plunging into the icy water below. Joker heard Harley scream then hit the water but he wasn't worried, he gotten her to the point she could swim like a fish so despite the fact that she'd just fallen from the dock's highest point and it was a few good yards from a point low enough she could climb out he wasn't concerned. Harley's fall caught Batman's attention for a split second but he noticed Joker wasn't moving to try and save her making slight confusion bubble in the back of his head.

"Going back to treating her like she doesn't mean anything? After you pulled all that crap to save her and bring her back to Gotham?"

Joker growled at him using the shipping crate he was backed against as leverage to land a kick to the other man's torso sending him back a few steps before laughing.

"You really are slow minded Batsy, that little saying about not being able to teach old dogs new tricks couldn't be more wrong when held against my queen, she can swim with the best of them now."

Batman clenched his jaw and grabbed Joker by the throat and slamming him against the crate.

"But for how long? It's a mile swim back to where she'd be able to crawl out and that water is freezing, she'll pass out from hypothermia before she gets there."

Joker let the words sink in and as if for the first time took in how cold the night air was. He snarled pulling a gun from his coat and firing at Batman ignoring the fact he knew it wouldn't do much against the bullet proof armor but it did the job of making him stumble back, taking the opportunity Joker let his goons take over fighting while he ran to the edge of the doc eyes searching for Harley. He caught sight of her bleached hair not far from where she fell, floating in the water, she was struggling to keep moving and even from where he was he could see her shaking. Letting out a snarl he looked around until he found a rope.

Grabbing it he quickly tied the end around the dock post and tossed the other end down near Harley but rather than wait for her to grab it he threw his jacket off and jumped in after her, images flashing in his head from when he'd jumped into the chemical vat after her. As he hit the water the liquid was like ice shards against his skin but he ignored it managing to grab ahold of Harley's leather jacket collar and pull her to him relieved when she clung to him shaking like a leaf as her teeth chattered and her hands fisted around his shirt.

"Hold on tight, and stay awake."

Harley nodded through her shaking holding herself closer to him as he started climbing the rope with surprising ease. Once back on the dock he grabbed his suit jacket and wrapped it around her pulling her close looking her over, her skin was a little paler than normal, she was soaking wet and shaking, her lips were tinted light blue and her fingertips were as well even as they held their death grip on his shirt but she looked unharmed. He held her tight to himself prying her hands from his shirt and cupping them in his own and blowing on them trying to warm them making her look up at him with a small smile.

"P-Puddin' what about you? You're all wet too."

Joker paused in warming her hands to meet her eyes then ran his thumb over the back of her hand.

"Don't worry about me kitten, you need to get warm first."

She opened her mouth to speak but was cut off by a black van driving up and Frost getting out opening the back door wordlessly. Joker nodded once to the man scooping Harley up in his arms before getting into the van still holding her as he sat in the seat, Frost got back in the driver seat and started driving. Joker looked at the seat beside him and seen his purple alligator coat before looking at Harley still slightly blue and shivering, he glanced up front making sure no one was looking in the back before grabbing the hem of Harley's drenched top.

"Get these off, all of it."

Harley's eyes widened a little and her brows knitted in confusion but did as she was told wiggling out of all her soaking clothes not exactly sure as to how this was helping her warm up until Joker grabbed his heavy coat and wrapped it around her before pulling off his soaked shirt then pulling her flush against him. Warmth started to enter her body and the shivers started to slow as the blue left her lips and fingers as her eyes closed and she curled against him, Joker rubbed his hands over her arms and back working to help her warm up ignoring the chill that was settling over himself as she finally stopped shaking and let out a relaxed sigh.

He looked down at her gently cupping her chin making her raise her eyes to his.

"Are you alright?"

Harley started to nod but stopped moving her hand to her stomach and wincing as she touched the bruise there.

"I got a bruise the size and shape of bat brain's foot on my stomach that hurts."

Joker carefully moves her so he can look at the mark before checking to make sure her ribs aren't hurt letting a growl slip as he finds two cracked ribs along with the nasty bruise.

"Stupid bats, he'll pay for this next time. See how he likes being kicked in the gut then thrown into freezing water."

Harley seen the dangerous gleam in his eyes making her bite her lip then move so she could tuck her head under his chin gaining his attention back enough he wrapped his arms back around her.

"Ya know what sounds absolutely heavenly now puddin'?"

Her only response was a low hum that seemed to morph into a purr as she ran her fingers over his chest.

"A nice hot bath with one of those rose bath bombs ya bought me for my birthday and a glass of warm red wine."

Joker chuckled placing a kiss to her hair.

"I think that sounds like a grand idea kitten."

Harley smiled letting her eyes close as her body finally warmed back up and relaxed, within minutes she was asleep making Joker shake his head but keep her close as he watched out the window at the city fly by.


	21. Chapter 21

**A/N: Hey babies! So with the holidays coming up feel free to drop any themed requests you have and I'll try to have them up before the holidays are here, I have a one shot in the works but I'm not making any promises that it will be up by Christmas but I'm trying. So in short if you have holiday requests or just a request feel free to drop them in a review or PM! Thanks everyone!**

 **Prompt: Joker has hallucinations while Harley is in Belle Reve -author's choice**

 **An Angel and a Demon**

Joker sat surrounded by every gun, knife, grenade, and any other type of weapon in the penthouse apartment along with two dozen roses, laptops and tablets, four little baby onesies and two unopened pregnancy test boxes. His eyes were closed with one leg bent supporting his arm while the other curled under the other, around his red lips was a black line in the shape of a smile, he didn't move besides the rise and fall of his shoulders as he breathed, anyone that didn't know better would swear he was sleeping where he sat. His posture changed slightly as if he were adjusting to the weight someone draping themselves over his shoulders and hands were slipping through the open front of his shirt to trace over his chest.

"I miss ya puddin'. Don't ya miss your Looney Toon? I'm sittin' here waitin' for ya ya come and get me daddy."

Joker gave a growled intake of breath letting his head fall back onto one shoulder like the other was occupied hearing Harley's voice purr in his ear.

"Daddy's tryin' baby, he's trying to find his Looney Toon and get you back here where you belong."

His response was a humorless laugh from across the room.

"Where she belongs? Now that's a joke, where she belongs is as far away from you as possible. You use her and abuse her, sweet talk her into your arms then you smack her around when she messes up and to top it off you have taught her to believe it's love."

Joker growled baring his silver capped teeth upon hearing Harleen's voice. Behind him a giggle reached his ear.

"You've treated me so well puddin' I couldn't imagine ever leavin' ya, I love ya with all my heart."

Before Joker could take in Harley's words Harleen jumped in again.

"You see? You've brainwashed her into thinking you really love her. Before everything you did to her she had a bright future, a NORMAL future with a husband that really loved her and children, all three things YOU can't give her, one of which you tried to give her then let be taken away."

"I wouldn't be happy with anyone but you Mistah J, who wants to be normal anyway it's so bleak and boring."

"You knew she was pregnant but you let her tag along anyway, the blood is on your hands as much as it was Jason Todd's before you killed him."

"The little birdie got what was comin' to him, ya made him pay for what he did."

"Maybe it was for the better, you would have been a horrible father, the abuse Harley suffered is bad enough but to submit a child to it would be far worse."

"We can always try again, Gotham needs an heir molded by the best man to ever control it. Imagine the Bat's face when we bring our little monster out to play, he'd shake in his tights."

"You didn't deserve the chance to be a father! Despite your leash and collar control over her Harley knows I am still around and I can still control her! I'll take her away for good! Make her go live with Pamela again and stay there, far away from YOU! Where you can't touch her or see her or hurt her ever again!"

Joker snarled opening his eyes and raising his gun in the direction of the ghostly hallucination of Harleen standing in front of the door with crossed arms and challenging blue eyes while behind him the shimmering hallucination of Harley giggled wildly twirling her hair around one finger while the other mimicked a gun followed by a childish 'pew pew' sound imitating a gun. Just as he was about to pull the trigger the door opened and Frost stepped in completely unfazed by the gun aimed at him and unaware of the hallucinations both vanishing as Joker slowly lowered his gun but kept his eyes on his right hand man.

"Where is she?"


	22. Chapter 22

**A/N: Hey babies! How is everyone? Just a little note to say, as always, feel free to drop any requests you have. This note is also to let you know I have a new one shot posted called "little surprises are the best surprises" so feel free to go check that out and as always I hope you enjoy and continue to send in requests! I got a little carried away with this story so it's a little longer lol sorry (so NOT sorry)**

 **Prompt: Lucy wants a pet -author's pick**

 **Puppy love.**

Harley was sitting on the living room sofa looking through one of her magazines gently blowing on the nails of her right hand so the blood red polish would dry faster, the tv played an episode of Looney Toons she'd seen hundreds of times but it was keeping the little blonde 5 year old happy as she giggled. Harley glanced over at her daughter and smiled, Lucy was sitting on the floor wearing a white shirt that had the words 'daddy's perfect little…' in black and red on the front and the word 'princess' air brushed in red and gold on the back with a large gold crown, her skirt was dark red and looks slightly like a tutu, her blonde hair was pulled up in a ponytail with a sparkly gold ribbon, either side of her on the soft white carpet was a large toy hyena one with a red collar and one with a blue collar, and scattered else where were coloring books, crayons, markers and a few other small toys including barbies that were missing limbs and hair.

Harley shook her head looking at one Barbie that had hair that had been roughly cut short and a large red marker smile on its face, Lucy was more a fan of finding ways to destroy the plastic dolls than playing with them and of course Joker got a kick out of it and Harley let it slide because the girl played well with her china faced dolls and baby dolls. Her attention was brought back to Lucy as a commercial for one of the humane societies came on the tv screen showing pictures of wide eyed puppies and cuddling kittens with sad music meant to pull at viewers heartstrings and clearly it was working on the five year old.

"Momma?"

Harley moved her eyes to meet Lucy's steel blue orbs a small smile tugging her red lips.

"Yeah puddin' pop?"

The girl bit her lip and moved to her mother's side before giving the older woman a full force doe eyed pout.

"Can we get a pet?"

Harley chuckled leaning forward and kissed her daughter's forehead lingering a minute to take in the slight smell of lavender coming from her daughter's skin.

"What did momma say last time you asked baby?"

Lucy pouted a little more sour now.

"Ask daddy."

Harley nodded moving her hand with dry nails to the girl's cheek gently tilting her head to look up.

"And what did daddy say?"

Lucy met her eyes her pout falling into a frown.

"Lucy isn't ready for a pet, I'm too little."

Harley nodded gathering the girl into her lap and kissing her hair.

"Maybe if you ask him again and show him how big you are he'll change his mind and get you a pet for Christmas."

Lucy looked up at her mother with wide hopeful eyes and a wider smile.

"How can I do that?"

Harley chuckled.

"Show daddy you're a big girl now?"

Lucy nodded excitedly earning a giggle from Harley as she lightly tapped the child's nose.

"Well you can do little things around the house like keeping your toys picked up, listening when momma and daddy tell you it's bedtime, eating all your veggies at dinner."

Lucy listened over the list and nodded looking determined before smiling jumping off the couch to start picking up her toys and art supplies.

"Daddy'll see! I'm gonna show him I'm a big girl!"

Harley chuckled getting to her feet and helping Lucy carry her toys back to her room and put them away before following the girl back to the living room watching as she sat back down on the floor between the toy hyena's watching the tv as the cartoons came back on. Harley smiled going to the kitchen to start dinner deciding on glazed carrots for the veggie of the night knowing Lucy would be planning on eating her veggies at any cost. After about an hour Harley picked up the tv remote and turned the tv off making Lucy look at her pouting.

"Help me set the table baby?"

Lucy's pout vanished at once replaced by a smile as she got up and helped Harley set the table. Just as Harley was setting the last plate down the door opened then closed making both girls look up, Lucy's smile growing as she set the silverware down.

"Daddy's home!"

She squealed as she ran to the door but slid to a stop seeing Joker wasn't there making her brow crease and Harley giggle behind her hand having seen Joker slip behind the couch and was currently sneaking up behind their daughter. Just before Lucy turned around Joker sprang and scooped her into his arms making her squeal a laugh and try to wiggle away half heartedly as Joker tickled her.

"Daddy stop!"

Joker smirked and ceased his attack kissing her forehead before catching her smirk as she moved in his arms to wrap her small arms around his neck before climbing onto his back making him laugh but hold her legs as he walked to where Harley was finishing putting dinner on the table and kissed her cheek.

"Welcome home puddin', how'd business go?"

Joker gave a low growl making Harley raise an eyebrow at him then nodding seeing the 'I'll tell you later' look as he moved to Lucy's chair and let her climb down onto it.

"How did my girls' days go?"

Lucy smiled brightly as she sat down in her chair.

"Great! Me and momma made pancakes for breakfast then we watched you on the news!"

Joker and Harley shared a smile as the blonde shrugged setting a plate in front of Lucy watching as the girl looked over her chicken and potatoes then curled her lip a little at the carrots.

"What else did we do today?"

Harley's words broke Lucy out of her one sided staring contest with her carrots making her smile.

"We had a tea party and momma put silly hats in my teddy bear!"

Joker cracked a smile as the girl giggled and began eating, seeing she was distracted Joker began explaining the deal that had gone south due to a rat in their midst making her give a low growl.

"Ya know I'd give my left ear to bet that it's Jensen, he's been actin' all jumpy and scared lately, I didn't like him from the start."

Joker chuckled patting her hand with a nod.

"We'll find out soon enough, I've got Frost on pest control as we speak but I'll hold you to that wager of yours kitten."

Harley smiled wide with a giggle.

"I was counting on it puddin'."

Joker shook his head turning his attention to eating, for a change. After a while the quiet was broke as Lucy set her fork down and smiled proudly.

"All done!"

Harley hid a smile behind her napkin as Joker raised an eyebrow at the girl.

"Are you really princess? Did you eat your veggies?"

Lucy nodded holding up her empty plate to show him making him smile.

"Did you really eat them or did you hide them? It's okay I won't tell momma."

Lucy laughed but shook her head lifting up her napkin showing she wasn't hiding them pulling a slightly impressed look from her father as Harley got to her feet and cleared the dishes taking them back to the kitchen smiling as she heard Joker asking the girl a final time if she had hid the carrots. Harley walked back to the table setting a plate down in front of Lucy containing a piece of cheesecake with chocolate drizzle and a raspberry.

"Since you've been such a big girl and ate all your dinner without a fit you get special dessert tonight."

Lucy's eyes widened as did her smile as the cake was placed in front of her before looking up at her mother.

"This is all mine?"

Harley chuckled nodding as she tucked her daughter's bangs behind her ear.

"Sure is puddin' pie so dig in then it's bath time."

Lucy giggled happily digging into her dessert while Harley moved to stand behind Joker rubbing his shoulders smiling as he leaned his head back against her torso letting his muscles start to relax under her touch but a smirk playing on his lips.

"Okay I'll bite before her bedtime tantrum, what's she up to?"

Harley smiled leaning down close to his ear making sure Lucy wouldn't hear.

"She's trying to show daddy that she's a big girl now so she can get what she wants for Christmas this weekend."

Before he could respond she kissed his cheek then moved to take Lucy's plate smiling softly as the girl yawned rubbing her eye.

"Okay momma's big girl go pick out your pajamas, momma will be there in a minute to start your bath."

Lucy nodded slipping out of her chair and making her way to her bedroom, once she was out of earshot Joker looked at Harley crossing his arms.

"What exactly is it she's trying to prove she's old enough for kitten?"

Harley turned to face him leaning on the counter a smirk playing on her lips as she tapped her nails on the marble, he could see the gears turning in her head deciding whether to answer straight or play around first, she decided on the later as she shrugged.

"Beats me Puddin', I mean she knows all she has to do is give you those puppy eyes and she gets what she wants."

Joker let out a low chuckle getting to his feet and going to her firmly pinning her hips to the counter with his own as his hands rested either side of her's his smile turning into a smirk meeting her game.

"Wonder where she got that trick from, I have faint memories of a similar look from another blonde girl but she was older and I think she was on her knees."

Harley laughed lightly hitting his shoulder before slipping her arms around his neck.

"Not funny puddin'."

Joker rolled his eyes lowering his lips to her jaw.

"Then why are you laughing Harl?"

Harley giggled feeling him nip her skin but as much as it seemed to nearly hurt to do it she slipped out of his hold heading for the hall leading to the bedrooms pausing to wink at him.

"Save the pillow talk for after I put our little devil to bed."

He gave a low growl that was less threatening and more playful making her giggle as she moved to Lucy's room smiling wider as she found the girl waiting in the bathroom with her favorite bubble bath and pajamas.

"Sorry baby, daddy needed to talk to momma about something."

Lucy nodded already knowing not to ask as she watched Harley turn on the water to just the right warmth then let the tub start to fill, adding the bubble bath when it was half full until there was a decent amount of white foam in the tub before turning the water off and helping Lucy in. Once the girl was bathed and dressed in her pajamas Harley carried her to the large queen sized white four poster bed and laid her against the pillows then tucking her in. Lucy smiled sleepily as her mother kissed her forehead.

"Did I show him momma?"

Harley chuckled stroking her hair.

"I think ya did puddin' pie, you were a very big girl."

Lucy smiled a little wider before she yawned making Harley's smile soften as she got to her feet.

"Do you want your night light?"

Lucy bit her lip looking over at the teddy bear shaped lamp on her dresser then nodded.

"Yes please."

Harley turned the lamp on and pressed a button on its base so it changed colors before going to the door pausing to look back at Lucy who was almost asleep.

"Good night baby, love you."

Lucy gave a sleepy smile.

"Night momma, love you."

Harley watched as Lucy's eyes closed before quietly shutting the door standing in the hall for a minute listening, she could hear Joker talking in the living room on the phone making her sigh and enter the master bathroom and submerging herself into a hot rose scented bubble bath letting out a long sigh as the scented foam and water washed over her letting her eyes close. As soon as her eyes closed the slight sound of the door opening made her give a small smile raising her hand up out of the water and pointing at Joker as he crept closer to the tub ready to scare her, or playfully try to shove her under the water.

"Don't even try it Puddin', momma just got her relaxing time started."

She gave a light chuckle hearing him huff and move to the sink. She opened one eye and found him running his fingers through his hair his shirt long gone and his dress pants exchanged for his low riding Arkham sweat pants. Catching sight of her watching him in the mirror Joker smirked continuing his grooming.

"So kitten are you going to tell me what our little monster wants so I can send the boys to get it?"

Harley sat up in the tub pulling her hair free of its bun to let it pool around her shoulders.

"She wants the same thing she wanted for her birthday."

Joker turned to face her leaning back on the counter crossing his arms over his bare chest watching as the blonde started washing her hair.

"We got her that bike, it's sitting in the garage because it's too cold to use it."

Harley softly chuckled shaking her head then flipping her hair over her shoulder to was the underside.

"Not that one J, the one that generally involves four legs, fur and a tail."

The bathroom was silent for a moment before Joker growled.

"She is not getting a pet. I've said it before and you know I hate repeating myself, no more pets in this house!"

Harley sighed figuring her relaxing bath was over so she drained the water stepping out, not bothering with a towel, she stepped into the shower to rinse off the suds.

"I know Puddin'."

Joker watched her with narrowed eyes.

"Then why does she keep asking?"

Harley rinsed off before shutting off the shower and getting out and grabbing her red monogrammed towel wrapping it around herself wringing her hair out over the mat.

"Because she's only little J, she wants companionship besides us all the time, something she's responsible for to show us she's growing up."

Joker growled his eyes locking with her's.

"No more pets."

Harley sighed flipping her hair and running her fingers through it as she walked to her end of the double sink and started removing her make up.

"Look J I know you made that rule after the boys but it would really make her happy, hell I think she'd be satisfied with a fish at this point she's only been asking since she was 3."

Harley was careful not to raise her voice to much or let on about the pang in her chest at the mention of Bud and Lou who had passed away from old age not long after Lucy turned a year old. The girl didn't exactly remember the hyenas but something was in her memory because she had her toy hyenas she'd begged for last year and they were even called Bud and Lou. After the hyenas had died Joker made the rule about no more pets claiming they had been to much trouble but Harley knew it was really because anything they got would never match up to the twin animals they'd raised from babies in his heart.

"I don't want to replace the boys as much as you Puddin' but it would make Lucy happy and you know you'd give anything to make her happy just like I would."

Joker growled again making her raise an eyebrow.

"She's just like you and it gets on my nerves, she needs to learn no means no, you're both so spoiled."

Harley felt her stomach twist as he moved from the counter forcing her to release a growl of her own stopping him in his tracks, she growled at him she never growled at him like that.

"Why?! You say she needs to learn no is no but you clearly don't! Taking as you please and leaving nothing safe, I don't have enough fingers to count the times you've put me on the line and the number of times that line snapped and I've become a casualty. Damn it J for once just listen to me, Lucy isn't going to be little forever she's going to grow up and move on so for right now isn't it important we make her happy and spoil her while we can? I know no animal will ever measure up to Bud and Lou but that shouldn't be a reason to keep Lucy from being happy."

When she finished speaking Joker didn't move or speak he didn't even meet her eyes for a long moment just examined the air between them. When he met her eyes Harley felt her shoulders slump and her jaw relax as she walked into the bedroom giving him a small glance as she passed before going to her closet to get out pajamas. Once she opened the closet Joker let out a heavy breath and left the room firmly closing the door making Harley jump a little as she pulled on a pair of pink shorts and a dark blue t-shirt. For a moment she considered following to make sure he wasn't in Lucy's room but after standing as still as she could and not hearing the girl wake up or crying she decided to let him steam himself out on his own as she got into bed keeping one ear open as she slipped into a light sleep.

After she didn't know how long the bed shifted beside her making her open her eyes to the pitch black room but her guard lowered a little as Joker's familiar scent reached her. Once he was settled under the covers she scooted closer intending to curl up with him like normal but just as she was about to rest her head on his chest he growled warningly at her making her stop.

"I'm mad at you kitten."

Harley pouted a little but scooted back to her side rolling over so her back was to him sulking. After a few minutes he sighed heavily and wrapped an arm around her waist pulling her close to him making her smile.

"I'm still mad at you, this is just because you won't stop whining."

Harley smiled wider rolling over then nuzzling against his chest as her eyes closed.

"Okay Puddin'."

With those words she let herself fall back asleep. The next couple days leading up to Christmas passed about the same with Lucy being sure to be on her best big girl behavior and dropping small hints when her father was around about a pet, most of the time he'd just roll his eyes and either slip off to who knows where or ignore it all together. Lucy could tell it was starting to get on her mother's nerves but decided it was better to stay out of the adult affaires and let her mother deal with her father. Finally Christmas morning arrived and the second the first rays of light appeared Lucy ran into her parents room climbing onto the foot of their bed and jumping around.

"Wake up momma! Wake up daddy! It's Christmas!"

Her response was a tired giggle from Harley as the blonde slowly opened her eyes but Joker just groaned and pulled the blankets up to cover his face causing Lucy to lose enough footing she fell onto the foot of the bed on her backside giggling as she bounced. Moving so she was on hands and knees she crawled up the bed as Harley rolled over onto her back rubbing her eyes and sat herself between her parents facing her mother.

"Come on momma! Get up!"

Harley chuckled looking at her daughter.

"What all I get is a noisy wake up call, no merry Christmas and no Christmas kiss? Maybe daddy has the right idea."

Lucy giggled.

"Ops. Merry Christmas momma."

With that she threw herself at her mother hugging her neck and kissing her cheek making Harley laugh holding her close.

"That's better, now see if you can wake your grouch of a daddy up."

Lucy slid back off Harley onto the bed and pulled the covers off her father's head.

"Wake up daddy!"

Her response was a heavy sigh before Joker sat up pinching the bridge of his nose.

"Remind me again Harl why it is kids think Christmas means being up at dawn?"

Harley rolled her eyes as she got to her feet and opened her arms for Lucy making the girl smile and stand on the edge of the bed then jump into her mother's arms making them both laugh.

"Stop bein' a Scrooge puddin'."

As she spoke Harley carried Lucy out of the bedroom rolling her eyes as they reached the living room and the words 'bah humbug' echoed from the bedroom. Once in the living room Harley set Lucy down and smiled as the girl squealed at the amount of gifts under the tree mostly addressed to her then started opening them while Harley watched sitting on the couch. Lucy was about halfway through her gifts, mostly toys and clothes and play make-up from Harley and Joker but one gift that was wrapped in green paper that contained a book of pressed flowers and a pouch of special seeds was from Ivy and another gift in a black and purple bag that contained a stuffed toy black cat with bright green eyes was from Selina.

Harley looked up from thumbing through the book of pressed flowers hearing Joker finally make his way out from the bedroom, looking over her shoulder she found he was dressed in a wine red dress shirt and black dress pants looking ready for work making her brows knit together.

"You're not going to work Puddin', it's Christmas half the guys aren't even here, Frosty isn't even here!"

Joker glanced at her rolling his eyes as he poured two cups of coffee then carried them into the living room sitting beside her as he handed her one.

"Relax doll, I'm only leaving to go down and pick up something from Freddie."

Harley relaxed a little sipping her coffee turning her attention back to Lucy as she grabbed a present wrapped in shimmering silver paper making Harley's brows knit together, all her and Joker's given gifts were wrapped in red, any from Ivy were green and Selina's in black or purple.

"Did you put that one there?"

Joker met her eyes for a second taking a drink of his coffee then looking at the gift and nodding.

"Yeah some little brunette gave it to Jimmy saying it was for you to give to Lucy. I had Frost examine it with a fine toothed comb so it's safe."

Harley thought carefully for a moment.

"Did Jimmy say anything else about how she looked?"

Joker thought for a moment recalling the conversation as he examined the security footage of the exchange.

"Yeah she was a mousy little thing, brown hair, blue eyes, glasses, lightly tanned skin, said her name was Jane, Julie something with a J."

He shook his head drinking the last of his coffee then raising an eyebrow at her as she suddenly smiled.

"June?"

Joker nodded as she said the name that had slipped his mind.

"Yeah that was it, know who she was?"

Harley nodded.

"Dr. June Moone or Junie as I called her for the half a day trip back to Belle Reve, she was the girl possessed by Enchantress that witch me and the squad killed and saved the world from. She was a pretty nice kid, mousy like you said but nice and she kept Rick in line about harping on us after all we'd done."

Joker nodded turning his eyes to Lucy as the girl finally managed to open the package and pulled out a china doll with blonde pigtails, blue eyes, wearing a dress that was a pale lavender color with a grass green ribbon around the waist, and it was holding a baseball bat that clearly hadn't been there when the doll was made. Lucy smiled holding the doll as she brought it over to Harley showing her.

"Look momma! She looks like me!"

Harley chuckled looking over the doll then noticed the little card attacked her her wrist.

"What's this?"

Lucy watched as her mother took the card and glanced it over before turning it to face Lucy.

"Can you read who it's from puddin' pie?"

Lucy bit her lip looking at the card.

"From June Moonie."

Harley's giggle made her stop and look confused until Harley shook her head.

"The 'e' is silent sweetie."

Lucy smiled going back to reading again.

"From June Moone-Flag, Rick Flag and Emily Flag."

Harley smiled lightly tapping the tip of Lucy's nose.

"Very good baby girl, you're getting better!"

Lucy giggled looking at the doll again as Harley gave it back to her.

"Is that all your presents?"

Lucy nodded holding her new doll close as she went to start getting the few gifts for her parents but stopped as Joker stood.

"Not quite yet, come here squirt."

Lucy set her doll down carefully in its box before going to her father letting herself be picked up and held on his hip.

"Daddy has one more present for you."

Lucy smiled brightly wrapping her arms around his neck.

"Really? Where is it?!"

Harley hid a giggle behind her hand then stood as Joker gestured for her to follow as he walked to the door. Leading them down into the empty club he set Lucy on her feet pointing to the rather large box sitting in the middle of the room.

"Have at it kiddo it's all yours."

Lucy smiled widely going to the box and after a moment figured out how to pull the lid off, a bit of a challenge since the box was nearly as tall as her, and once it was off she pulled herself up onto the side looking in. Harley looked at Joker with a raised brow making him smirk as Lucy dropped from the side of the box and ran to her father hugging his legs tight smiling bigger and brighter than Harley had ever seen.

"Thank you daddy! I promise I'll take good care of them! Thank you thank you thank you!"

Joker chuckled lifting her into his arms lightly tapping her forehead.

"Alright alright enough with the mushy stuff time for serious talk."

Lucy nodded but was unable to keep the smile off her face as she met Joker's eyes.

"Now after seeing you being such a big girl daddy decided to get you what you wanted but you have to promise daddy you'll take care of them and that means cleaning up after them, teaching them not to bite unless told, feeding them and watering them, and most importantly to listen to only you, momma and daddy. Can you do that?"

Lucy nodded her smile disappearing behind a serious look.

"I promise daddy."

Joker nodded and kissed her forehead.

"That's my little devil, now why don't we let them out to meet their new mommy?"

Lucy nodded following him as he set her down, Harley watched smiling as Joker reached into the box and lifted out two little hyena pups by their scruffs and set them on the floor in front of Lucy.

"Don't grab at them Lucy, they aren't like normal pups they'll bite if they get scared and it hurts, let them come to you."

Lucy nodded looking down at the pups as they sniffed around before looking at her slowly moving closer to her sniffing then yipping happily and licking her hands and face making her giggle. Harley made her way over leaning on Joker's side as he wrapped an arm around her shoulders.

"You already scented her to them?"

Joker nodded reaching into the box and pulling out one of Lucy's baby blankets.

"Been around it ever since they were born."

Harley smiled looking down at Lucy as she petted the pups making them give laugh like barks before kneeling down holding out her hand whistling to get their attention. The pups perked up their ears and looked at Harley cautiously sniffing her hand before their tails wagged and they licked her fingers making her smile and carefully pick one up by the scruff not missing the slight look of worry in Lucy's eyes.

"It's okay baby it doesn't hurt them being picked up like this, it's like when daddy picks you up by the back of your shirt."

Lucy relaxed holding the other pup as it crawled into her lap while Harley rolled the one she had onto its back then setting it down letting it go back to Lucy as she looked up at Joker.

"Boys?"

Joker nodded helping her stand.

"Both of them, fixed already and given their shots so they won't be aggressive, they're all set to be raised."

Harley smiled kissing his cheek.

"You had this planned all along didn't you?"

Joker smirked shrugging.

"Maybe, maybe not. Had to wait for a two male litter other wise she would have had them last year."

Harley's smile softened as she looked back at Lucy who was holding the pups as she stood.

"What are ya gonna name 'em baby?"

Lucy looked up at her mother biting her lip.

"Bud and Lou."

Harley felt her chest tighten but she looked at the pups.

"How about something different sweetie, Bud and Lou were momma's hyenas these are yours."

Lucy nodded looking at the pups as they began grooming each other.

"Jester and Spade."

Harley giggled seeing a smile tug Joker's lips as the girl smiled widely explaining.

"Like a card deck, Spade is the one that looks like a shovel head and Jester like a joker card! I'd call him Joker but I can't take that from daddy."

Joker let a laugh escape his lips making Lucy smile again walking over to them letting Harley take the pups looking them over while Joker picked Lucy up lightly poking her cheek calling her cheeky earring a laugh. Harley looked back at the father daughter pair before handing the pups to Lucy.

"So who's who baby?"

Lucy looked at the pups and pointed to the slightly smaller one.

"That's Jester and that's Spade."

She pointed to the bigger one making Harley chuckle earring her two confused looks.

"What's so funny?"

Harley met Joker's eyes then Lucy's still smiling.

"Honey, Spade is a girl. You can still call her that if you want to or you can change her name."

Lucy looked down at the pups and blinked wondering how her mother knew but shrugged it off smiling.

"Okay then I'll call her Harlequin."

Harley smiled kissing her daughter's cheek then Joker's as he looked confused still making her giggle and lean close to his ear.

"Females have those parts to puddin' it's hard to properly sex them so young but she's a girl."

Joker shook his head looking at the pups now sleeping in Lucy's arms then shrugged.

"At least it's a matching set then a jester and a harlequin."

Harley smiled nodding and watching as Lucy got her father's attention making him lean down close before she kissed his cheek.

"Thank you daddy."

Joker smiled kissing her forehead.

"Anything for my girls."

He looked at the pups as Jester woke up enough to move around and look at him.

"Looks like you and me are outnumbered furball."

Lucy and Harley laughed as Jester yawned and went back to sleep and Joker shook his head.


	23. Chapter 23

**A/N: Hey babies, so serious talk time so gather around! Firstly I know I've been absent from this story and site for quite awhile and that is because my eye shifted to the Harley and Ivy paring a little and this site doesn't have a very popular base for those two so I've been using my Archive of Our Own account to post those stories, if you want to check out that account go find me as LucytheLittleHarlequin. Now I haven't abandoned these stories by any means so don't panic I am actually working on a continuation to Lucy's Kingdom between working on my HarlIvy stories so updates might not be very common for which I apologize greatly. Lastly I've just recently started Gotham, I've watched the first season and am about 9 episodes into the second, soo some stories may sway more towards BatCat content but the focus always sway back to HarlIvy (if you're looking at my Ao3 account). So to sum everything up: I am NOT abandoning anything, updates will be slow and I apologize! Now onward to the story.**

 **Prompt: A tale involving Bud and Lou -Siberia0427**

 **Babies.**

Harley sat on the floor of her and Joker's penthouse bedroom beside a very large and very ripped up dog bed, tears streamed down her cheeks dropping down onto the pile of fur across her lap staining it with more dark spots than was naturally on the rough fur. Her legs had gone numb hours ago but she didn't care as she sniffled wiping her eyes, not that it helped do anything but smear her makeup across her face more, before placing shaking hands on the heads resting in her lap hiccuping a sob as two pairs of amber eyes opened to look at her and whine weakly.

"S-sshh babies, it's okay just rest, y-you'll be o-o…"

She couldn't even finish the word 'okay' before the sobs overtook her again making the pair of hyenas in her lap whimper again, they were very tired and sore but their leader, no their mother, was upset and they'd always cheered her up when the warm water came from her pretty eyes. Harley choked back a sob stroking their heads.

"Shhh its o-okay sleep babies, go to sleep and when you w-wake up you'll feel a lot better."

The hyenas watched her as she gave a wavering smile and continued stroking their heads but the warm drops kept sliding down her cheeks and landing on their fur. They didn't want to sleep knowing she was upset, they'd made it their job a long time ago to never let her be upset for long but they were tired, their joints ached, their jaws were stiff, old scars seemed to open up and cause pain again. Harley opened her mouth to tell them again to rest but the slightly older of the brothers forced himself to stand, it hurt like hell but his mother was clearly in more pain if she was crying, he stood on shaking legs looking at her with sad eyes and a whimper before nudging her cheek.

Harley didn't know what to do, her heart was being torn apart so she did the only thing that she knew could help, she wrapped her arms carefully around the standing hyena and buried her face in his mane.

"Bud please rest, mommy's fine she just wants her babies to rest..Lou not you too."

She pulled herself away from Bud to look at the other hyena who was now standing and whining at her, a lump formed in her throat as she looked between them before shaking her head to shake off her tears then kissing each on the muzzle.

"Mommy's okay sweeties lay back down."

Bud and Lou whined but laid back down each resting their head in her lap, their limbs were too weak to hold their bodies up any longer and what the green haired alpha had injected them with was making them very very sleepy and dulled some of their pain making it hard to keep their eyes open. Harley stroked their heads watching as their eyes started to close.

"Good-bye babies, mommy loves you so so much she always will."

As their eyes closed Harley felt the final part of her heart crumble as each took a final breath before going completely still and limp on her lap, her tears started again and this time she didn't try to stop them as she leaned over her now passed pets pained sobs ripping from her throat vocalizing the pain in her chest. Her sobs lasted around 5 minutes before her throat was too raw to produce the sounds anymore and she was only able to sniffle and whimper her eyes closed sore from crying. She could remember the day she'd been given the hyenas as pets.

Xx~~xX

It was around a month after becoming Harley Quinn when Joker had come home and told her he'd gotten her a present. He'd led her down to the garage and ordered his henchmen to bring the crate out and open it. When the crate opened it revealed two small and scared hyena pups huddling together on top of a ratty blanket and what looked like one of her shirts. She looked at Joker for instruction but all she got was a nudge closer to the pups as a silver smile crossed his lips making her swallow thickly, she may have been his girl now but he'd made it clear if she stepped out of line there were consequences, but she inched her way closer to the crate and lowered herself onto her knees then slowly held out a hand to the cowering pups.

"Hey babies, come here it's okay, everything's okay."

The pups looked at her for a long moment before one inched closer to her hand and sniffed it before to her surprise it jumped at her like a normal puppy and started licking her face the other one quickly joining in, she couldn't help but laugh as she petted their fur looking back at Joker as he spoke.

"It actually worked. Listen kitten, these are your responsibility now and I expect you to train them up and I don't mean to be lap pets."

Harley looked down at the pups as they looked up at her with shining amber eyes as if already waiting for her instruction and attention and nodded her smile softening.

"Sure thing Puddin'."

From that day on Bud and Lou were always at Harley's side waiting for her orders or to protect her, and the protecting didn't matter who it was from if anyone got too close for their liking Bud and Lou would growl and cackle with fur on end ready for blood unless Harley told them to fall back, they were trained by their first year to kill on command and even Joker had learned that all Harley had to do was say one word and they'd come running to her aid mid kill. They'd given Batman and all his little batlings hell with the brothers but it didn't stop there, many times Joker would have them at the club lounging in the corner of his office with gold collars around their necks while Harley was the trigger sitting in his lap or under his arm, if he wanted to play all he had to do was turn Harley loose on the poor bastard in the meeting and as soon as they disrespected her by refusing her she'd whistle once then turn her back as the brothers growled and cackled before following orders and attacking.

It wasn't always blood and death with the hyenas though, there were times they were Harley's biggest source of comfort, nights when Joker was locked up in Arkham and away from her or when he was angry with her they were at her side licking her tears away and snuggling close to her letting her cry into their fur until she fell asleep or the man they knew as the green haired alpha came for her. When she got pregnant and their crimes died down for her protection they became her constant companions and protectors, no one was allowed near her in their eyes and they'd bitten many henchmen and snapped at Joker until he'd kicked them in the jaws then they left him alone with nothing more than warning growls. The night Harley went into labor they nearly broke down the bedroom door trying to get in and see what was hurting their mother but it resulted in them being locked in kennels in the living room for several hours. When they met the odd screaming furless creature with blonde hair and blue eyes they didn't know what to make of her but Harley told them they needed to be nice to her and protect her like good brothers and so they did.

As the year moved on and the blonde creature began to grow the brothers found time turning cruel to them, their limbs began to hurt, their jaws were stiff when they ate, it was getting harder and harder to move and get up at all. The odd shivering spells were the worst because they would make Harley cry and panic until it passed then she'd sit with them and pet them letting them lay in her lap for hours after even if it was the middle of the night she was there. The last one was different, the shaking spell started but this time it hurt causing them to cry out, this time Harley sat with them through it but the green haired alpha had come in and injected them with needles causing the shaking to stop and tiredness to set in as Harley cried over them telling them it was okay to sleep that they'd feel better.

Xx~~xX

Harley's attention was pulled away by the sound of the bedroom door opening making her turn her head to see who it was, Joker stepped cautiously into the room his brow furrowed hiding the pain she knew he secretly felt at losing the hyenas.

"Are they..?"

He didn't want to finish the question and Harley didn't give him time to as she nodded a few tears sliding down her cheeks again. He walked over to her and looked down at the limp bodies still resting on her as if still protecting her before swallowing thickly helping Harley stand and holding her tight when she clung to him.

"They'll get a proper send off kitten, they deserve it."

Harley only nodded weakly in his arms looking up with she felt something warm and wet hit the top of her head, she found Joker was looking at the hyenas with an odd pain in his eyes and a tear trail on his cheek. Noticing she was watching him he clenched his jaw and began leading her out of the room.

"No more pets."

Harley didn't answer not that she'd gotten time to as the sound of little hands and knees reached her ears as they stepped out of the room and into the hall. Sure enough seconds later Lucy was crawling as fast as she could their way but Harley's broken heart twisted knowing the child was looking for the hyenas since they were practically inseparable, hell the child's second word had been Bud and a few days later Lou and if Harley had been anyone else she wouldn't have noticed the way the hyenas seemed proud the child knew them by name.

The little blonde finally crawled within reach and Harley bent down and lifted her up earning a confused look and a point into the bedroom.

"Bud Lou?"

Harley forced a smile onto her face, something one would think would be easy after years and years of being at Joker's side, and shook her head gently grabbing the child's hand in her own.

"No baby, Bud and Lou are sleeping right now, let them rest."

Lucy still didn't seem to understand but she didn't push as Harley walked away from the door holding her a little bit tighter but Joker lingered at the door looking into the dark room listening until Harley was out of earshot.

"Good boys, you did your job perfectly so you deserve a good rest."

Call him crazier than he already was but there was a part of Joker, somewhere in his chest, that wished the hyenas would hear him and perk up spry as puppies again at the parse, knowing it wasn't going to happen he slowly closed the door watching the spotted pelts be engulfed in darkness until the door was shut. He took a minute to take a deep breath and steel himself before following Harley to the living room knowing she needed him right now because she was feeling the blow a lot harder.


End file.
